lauren elizabeth

wintersong.

2011-12-08T23:23:00.000-07:00

today i was reminded why i love winter. because then i can listen to this song over and over and not feel weird. it will always be one of my favorite winter time songs :)

and i MAYYY or may not be counting down to ingrids new cd...coming january. 24th. talk about best day EVER!!!

the best medicine.

2011-11-14T22:58:00.000-07:00

what's better than laughing? the kind that you cant breathe or tears fall from your eyes. the kind that comes from deep inside you and takes over your entire body. the kind that makes you forget about everything else going on.

laughter is so interesting. our bodies do it naturally. we recognize something is funny and our bodies and minds react so quick and out comes this sound that you cant do on purpose. you cant REALLY, honestly, laugh on purpose. of course you can fake laugh- but a true heart felt laugh, its just cant be done.

i love that everyone can laugh, but every ones laugh is different. every ones sounds unique to them. i remember the very first night that i met Zach- i noticed his laugh over everything else. it was so unique to him and his eyes would water, without fail. he is one of those people that you like to have around if you think you are funny- because he will laugh at all your jokes. yes, in high school he got in trouble a lot because he was the kid that was laughing in the middle of class and couldn't stop. i remember hearing him laugh and thinking how much i liked his laugh. it was genuine and when i heard it, i would laugh too.

who ever said that laughter is the best medicine is genius. it was no mistake that we are made to laugh. it is something we do so much and its so common that i tend to forget just how simply wonderful it is :)

let the sounds flood my ears

2011-11-07T22:58:00.000-07:00

i like music. this is currently some tunes im enjoying. take a listen if you want. but only if you want.

n o s t a l g i a

2011-11-06T20:45:00.004-07:00

"The term of "feeling nostalgic" is more commonly used to describe pleasurable emotions associated with and/or a longing to go back to a particular period of time."

im feeling that way. im feeling nostalgic. yearning for the past. dont get me wrong, however, i love the present. but i cant help but have a part of my heart that craves a bit of my past. it seems as if random things throughout my day will remind me of that part of my life. eating muffins, drinking redbulls, hearing certain songs, wearing black, eating popcorn in ziploc bags, seeing the letters- PMTS. the year and a half of my life spent in none else, but good old hair school.

every morning i woke up to the sound of miss kerilyn hoping in the shower and turning on her "wake up " radio. at least thats what i called it. it was either blaring top 40 radio- or what i call "hollister music" ya know- like yellowcard and that kind of stuff. i disliked her hollister music, but i didnt mind because i had purple ear plugs with me at all times and would just stick those babies right in. i was always last to get up. sometimes cates would have to come in my room and remind me that we had school in 20 minutes. if i was lucky, sophie was usually sleeping on my floor. on a home made bed of random comforters and pillows from different odds and ends of the apartment. i was obnoxious in the mornings. i was always running late, but yet i was happy as a clam. i rolled out of bed every morning still laughing from the day before. it was simple. there was nothing extravaggant about these mornings- but i miss them all the same. i miss all getting ready in the same bathroom and then all taking our own cars to school up the street a couple blocks. (i still dont know why we did that?)

the days were filled with saving seats, pretending to help judy, running off to other schools to help with the design team, walking over to crest 343298 times a day, laying on the lunch table outside praying your number didnt get called (or pretending it wasnt your number when it did get called- wait a second....? haha) sippin on redbull and eating bags and bags of fire cheetos, chatting in the laundry room, and of course making fun of katys voice when she was the ticket runner. there was no such thing as a boring day at paul mitchell. the memories we had are endless. somehow all i can remember is how much i laughed during that 18 month period of my life. whether it was because chelsea was driving like a mad women in her yellow smart car, or because cates had fallen asleep for the 5876th time in class or aunt kath was trying to hook us up with her sons friends in highschool.

our little group formed into the most diverse hilarious bunch that i ever had the pleasure of knowing. we went everywhere together. we were all so different- but thats exactly what i loved the most.

first there was chelsea. 99. the quiet, somehow barely on time, never slept a wink, long blonde fresh beauty from provo. she was always dissapearing and reapearing without saying a word. i swear she had a secret life that she was living in that tiny smart car of hers. she could take you on the ride of your life in that thing, speeding like no tmrw, but somehow NEVER got pulled over. she had her head on straight from day one and the minute i took a look into her ipod and saw that we had 98% of the same artists- i had instant love for her.

then bounced in miss katy. 95. her strinking features and touchy nature was hard to miss. she had drive and motivation bursting from every pore of her body. creativity spilled from her finger tips and opinions freely flowed out of her mouth everywhere she went. it was the deep conversations at the shampoo sink while tears both streemed down our faces, i felt like i had found a new older sister.

there was also our little b. 39. when she wasnt sleeping- she was being her loveable self- befriending people all around her. although we always teased her for being "blonde and ditzy" she was the punctual one. she was on time and she was always just ONE step ahead of everyone- whether that meant signing up for something, getting something paid for, having her homework complete etc etc. story telling isnt her biggest strong point- but listening to her tell a story could have you in tears. she was able to laugh at her self more than anyone else i know. and sometimes there was nothing sweeter than hearing her say "wait what?"

somehow we managed to squeeze a boy in there. jordan. 26. every girl had a crush on him, including every learning leader as well. he was our little smooth punk rocker that somehow mangaged to put up with all of us girls. with his all black vans, slicked back hair, and a little cocky yet most respectful persona, he was the cherry on top of our crew.

mackenzie came next. 50. she was the love struck innocent beauty. if you were a missionary- you would want kenz as the girl who was waiting for you. she was always sending off packages, recieve movie worthy love letters or crossing off the days till her boy came home. seeing how happy she was, made you happy- just to know her. she reminded everyone around her what it was like to be in love and sometimes there was nothing more endearing than simply just that.

cant forget miss kerilyn. 20. sassy could have been her middle name. she made everyone around her laugh and she had more personality packed into that little red firey self of her than she knew what to do with. cat lover, music lover, and tlc addict- this girl became the spice to my sugar. strangers made her nervous- but if you ever saw her sing "salt n peppa" you wouldnt believe she had a shy bone in her body. she had her own lingo that we all picked up- she placed a "the" in front of every noun. the crest. the taco bell. the forever21. she was my 11.

unexpectadly we had a missing piece from our puzzle join us. que marissa. 51. rissa only joined us for the last part of school but it didnt take long before she was showing us her crazy faces while still mangaing to be the most perfect thing we had all ever laid eyes on. how she balanced it all, being so fashionable, hilarious, and of course making really good home made videos. her confidence was admireable and i think if we all had a girl crush- it was on her.

mary quite contrary. mary had a little lamb. mary jean. 87. she could spray a energy drink about a foot in the air. she was the life of the party and rukkkus was wear the memories were made. she knew how to party like a rock star, yet was the sweetest bad girl i knew. her contagious laugh was one that made everyone else laugh just when you heard it.

last but not least darling little soph. 74. if there was a teachers pet- she wins. i think she could have ran for president at pmts. with that little voice of hers, and compassion for everyones feelings- soph is what tied us all together. she made sure that not a soul was left out. she was everyone's "go to girl." everyones conselor and everyones best friend. .there times we had to look out for her- and tell everyone to put away their dang peanuts unless they wanted to fight in the back alley. with a smart water in hand-, and a blue berry muffin in the other, she was ready to conquer everyones problems.

we somehow found ourselves, despite how different we all were- being new best friends. i saw these guys without fail, 5 days a week from 9-4, for a year and half straight. i knew these people better than i knew myself sometimes. we laughed, we cried, we got annoyed with eachother, we laughed some more and we loved eachother through and through. we knew that one day we would all graduate and move on with our lives and follow our dreams. we were all excited for what the future held, but sad to leave behind some of the fondest memories. it happened so fast- soon we were all living apart from eachother, some in other states. and it felt like in the snap of a finger- i had a part of me ripped out. its not that i dont talk to any of these people anymore- but it was so different to be living with these guys and seeing them every singggggle day- that made the experiece one i will never ever forget. i loved that year and a half of my life. i met some of the most incredible people ive ever known. and each and every one of them taught me something different.

in about a month it will be the year anniversary that the majority of us gratuated. i cant believe 11 months have gone by since then. although life keeps going on and that date will get farther and farther away- i will never forget those times with my best friends. i will always have a big place in my heart for every single one of them and the memories we shared.

grateful

2011-09-29T23:40:00.000-06:00

i am beyond grateful. grateful that no matter how lonely life feels- things always get brighter. life will throw you down- kick you while youre down- but then there are those small moments that grab you by the hand and just bring you up to your feet once again. and let me tell you- life needs those sour moments in order for those sweet moments to be as lovely as they are. im grateful that life keeps me in check. that life gives me moments where i feel weak. so that when i get through the struggle, i feel accomplished. and strong. and proud of myself. you have to hit the low sometimes to be able to be truly grateful when things are looking up. as much as i needed that moment- i am more than thrilled to be back to myself and feeling positive about life.

i a m g r a t e f u l f o r :

a friend that i can tell everything to and has stuck by my side through everything

a darling boyfriend who accepts my flaws

music that will fit my every mood

relief society general broadcast

spending quality time with my sisters and cute parentals

lunch dates in the middle of crazy days

enjoying time with my doggy in her old old age

sending an emoticon with every text message

having worlds best job! with the best people. beyond lucky.

drinking an ice cold red bull even though you know its not the healthiest thing

sunshine so warm at the end of september

waking up in the morning feeling excited

2011-09-02T18:41:00.000-06:00

i had a good cry. i needed this.

rules.

2011-09-01T00:56:00.000-06:00

Im going to do us all a favor and skip the part where i talk about how its been SOO long since ive blogged. because i know it, you know it. its obvious and so there's no need to make my little fingers tired by writing a huge explanation about me being m.i.a. it was summer and thats all i think needs to be said.

everyone has rules they live by. whether you like rules or not, you probably dont realize how often they sneak there way into your everyday life. lately ive been thinking about the rules i live by everyday. but ive been thinking more along the lines of little rules we dont even realize we make but we live by them everyday- unwritten rules if you will. like for example, if your going on a road trip you MUST have your ipod with you. am i right? its no set in stone rule. but its just one of those things you do. so being the weird list loving person i am- i decided to write a few of my "unwritten rules" down in my phone over the past couple days to see what i came up with. these rules however are not for everyone, heck, they are just personal ones for myself and myself only. im the only one that lives by these rules- but they are my own little set of "unwritten rules" that i follow day after day.

Laurens list of "unwritten rules"

1. when in Mexico- drink orange fanta.

2. if eye contact is made, always ALWAYS smile.

3. when at walmart or target, always stroll down the barbie toy isle.

4. if hair is a hot mess= tie scarf around your head

5. always be yourself

6. if a compliment crosses your mind, always say it out loud.

7. you can never wear too much jewelry

8. taste everything at least once.

9. if someone is waiting or pampering you- be appreciative.

10. when bored in a busy place (such as the airport) people watch for entertainment

11. when you feel sorry for yourself, count your many blessings.

12. when at 7-11, buy a chocolate dunford donut or flamin hot cheetos.

13. wear your boots in the summer time too.

14. always say yes to helping people out, even if its the last thing you want to do.

15. have at least one TV series you watch.

im sure i could find a whole lot more- but thats just a jist of it. i think everyone has those unwritten rules that they apply to their life that make them unique. plus we are creatures of habit- even if you dont realize that you made it a rule for yourself- chances are, youve just made it a habit and continued to do it your whole life.

what are some of your unwritten rules?

Confessions of a night owl

2011-07-06T23:46:00.000-06:00

Let's be honest. I "tried" to go to bed early...and I laid there and after about 40 minutes I was over it. I found myself eating a bowl of cereal and watching E! But I'm not surprised. It's not that I have insomnia- I just have this thing for night time. I get my second wind and there is something so calming about everyone else being asleep. It's like the world is on pause. The only problem to this is the next morning. Because life doesn't go on pause, so while everyone else was getting sleep- I was wide awake. And the next morning- i feel it. Ad I usually regret it. I wish I could sleep in all morning lon- but then have it be 8 when I wake up so that I sill had the whole entire day. Buuut wait it doesn't work that way. Although I regret it the next morning- I do it all over the next night. Why am I so addicted to this terrible sleeping habit? When am I gonna figure out that life would be much easier if I didn't go to bed so late?? It honestly is like a civil war within my self. One day I will figure it out. And when I do- I'll let you know. Until then, night owl status xoxo.

fighter.

2011-06-28T01:32:00.001-06:00

the other day i was at the farmington pool with my family. just minding my own business, when all the sudden- i saw this little boy. i honestly felt like someone had taken a dagger to my heart. i was completely overwhelmed and felt like someone had hit me with a big brick called reality. i watched him in awe, and i was so amazed at the way he moved and got around the pool. it made me realize how small and minature my promblems were and how big my blessings really are. however- this little boy isnt "not blessed", because i believe he is a lucky and blessed individual as well. he seems to me like one of the strongest, bravest people ive ever seen- theres no way that i could go through a trial like his and have the positivity and determination that he does. i learned a big lesson that day. mainly for myself- that i am beyond blessed and everyday i need to be grateful for what i have been given, even if it feels like im having a bad day. because you know what? it could always be worse, harder, more difficult. this little boy is an amazing example of being positive and happy even though he suffers everyday from being able to fit in with the norm. he is a fighter. and i want to be just like him too- i want to be a fighter and realize that nothing can make me feel like i cant do something. my favorite quote is something that pops into my head a lot but im not sure who its by. it says something along the lines that life is 25% of what happens to us, and 75% of how we react to it. i believe that this boy is a living testimony of that statement. hard things happen- but its our reaction and actions that define how we live our lives. its people like him that show me that my life is beautiful if i believe it to be- and thats all i have to do, is believe it, and after that, it will all fall into place and it really will become a reality.

continued.

2011-06-26T19:35:00.000-06:00

a couple more "dears"

dear pool bathrooms,

you are absolutely disgusting. i'd rather pee in the pool than deal with you. just being honest.

dear "ha-ha",

yeah you, with the dash. not "haha". im talking "ha-ha". why? why the dash? do we need it? it makes the laugh seem like its in slow motion. ha- (3 seconds later) ha.

dear new apple employee,

interviews after interviews- you deserved it! 90 people turned into 8. you have always been one to stick out. oh ps- now lets get this huge crack in my screen fixed. new phone?

dear summer,

i only see you 2 or 3 times a week. but when i do, its so wonderful it makes me love you even more. why dont you start visiting more often. come sooner and stay later ya know? maybe we could come up with some sort of deal?

dear radical face,

you have become my favorite summer pandora playlist of all time. and thats saying a lot. cus i have like 30 stations- you win :)

dear red velvet cupcakes,

we are in a fight. you won. you won like 7 times in 8 days. screw you- you delicious pieces of heaven.

dear chalean,

oooooh hi. yeah remember me? we havent worked out together in like 2 weeks. i promise to change that. i miss it. i miss your hilarious comments. lets hang out this week? k deal.

dear mechanical pencils,

im sorry. im sorry for ever forgetting you existed. now that i found you again, i cant believe i cheated on you with a pen. i hate pens. take me back? i love you- you look really good when your .5 lead too.

dear cramps,

what is your purpose? why must you be so painful...and why dont boys have to deal with you ever? dont see the point in you- at all. leave me alone.

dear bachelorette,

i have mixed feeling about you this season. i cant decide if i hate you or if i just dont like you. both negatives i know. anywho get your crap together and start getting more interesting.

and lastly dear facebook,

would you mind switching up who pops up on my news feed every once in while? im getting sick of seeing the same people over and over again. maybe i should just take a break from you.....but we both know that wont last long. dang you.

sincerely yours,

lauren

Dear

2011-06-25T23:44:00.000-06:00

Dear blog of mine,

It's true that we have took some time apart. I needed space to think about things and just clear my head. It wasnt you - it was me. Its come to my attention that my neglect has been drawn out for much too long, and I've decided to give this another go. Ya sure I'm busy, and when I'm not busy- I spend every minute i can soaking up sunshine. But I've decided to make you a deal. We shall play at least once a week. Let's start with that goal in mind and see where that takes us. This letter doesn't count as this weeks either- so expect to see me in the next few days. Remember when we used to do challenges and things? That was fun- maybe we should try something similar to that again. We will see. Anyways I do apologize for being such a bad blogger to you but I will make it up to you. I'm ready. I'm ready to give thi another go. And to be quite frank, I really did miss you.

Sincerely,
Lauren

confessions of a...

2011-05-30T00:53:00.000-06:00

Ya know when people talk about their past haunting them? Well my past is pretty calm. Nothing too crazy from me- the worst I ever did was sneak out-oh wait, my friends couldn't even convice me to do that. So you see- I'm not the most dare devil type. It's not that I didn't want to have random adventures- I did still have great times, just nothing that I regret whole heartily today. However, my past is still haunting me. Because it has come to my full attention that I had a bad case of 'toolette'. That's what my friends call it. You know- the girls in the designer jeans, shop at the buckle, 6 days a week spent at the tanning salon. Friends- this was me. This was me at full throttle. And let me tell you- I am not proud.

I once upon a time spent hundreds of dollars on jeans. The more stuff packed onto the pocket- the better! I spent ridiculous amounts of money on juicy charms and juicy slippers, Ed hardy shoes and hats. I even had a really cute Ed hardy key chain (sike). I went tanning like it was my job- I was black on January 2nd. I thought boys with big trucks were so cute, and a little faux hawk would just seal the deal. Put him in a nice pair of trues and i was smitten. And i always had a big pair of diamond studs in my ears.( Don't worry- while I wrote this, I was throwing up in my mouth. ) on a better note, i never once owned a pair of ugg(lies) and dont plan on it either.

These days you couldn't catch me dead. And yes whenever I see jersey shore I can't help but think of my original snooki poof. As much as I wish I could say- I never liked that look, I cant lie. Because when I roam through my highschool pics and Dixie albums - I am haunted by my lack of style and look.
How did i become so obsessed withthe bling and dazzled and why didnt anyone try and stop me? Where was my head and was was elle, glamour, vouge, and harpers baazar to resurrect myself? Was someone playing a sick joke on me and my wallet? Cus it certainly isn't funny and it certainly doesn't make sense why anyone would want anyone to go through such a thing! At night I just have to clothe my eyes and thank everyone that has helped me get back on to the right path that I am on today. I don't know where I would be if I hadn't- I would probably have wings on the back of my shirt- in rhinestones!

Okay okay. although I am disappointed in myself- I have to say that I am glad my past haunts me because of my taste in clothes rather than the choices I made. Because although I wore awful clothing and had awful taste in what was cute- I had some of the best years of my life down in st george (where my toolette days were waxing strong) that I will never forget. I had the time of my life, even if I was doing it in a Jean skirt from American eagle- I was living with amazing people and having amazing adventures all day long. As I grow up I realize how I wont have those opportunities to live with my friends like that anymore but i will always treasure those memories forever.

So although my past has been haunting me- I also really loved my past. And I've been kind of starting a new chapter in my life, with starting a career and moving back home and growing up- but this time I just hope to do it a with better taste- plain jeans for 10 bucks and certainly no Ed hardy, designer jeans or juicy couture....

until next time, a few photos of my toolette days to humor you.

make it stopppp, make it stooop!! thats all that i can bear to look at for now ...

adios.xoxxxx.

ocd:foodaddition

2011-05-22T22:27:00.000-06:00

blame it on the way i was raised. but i love me some food. i love to talk about it. spend money on it. go to nice places to get it. and most importantly, i love to eat it.

blame it on the way i was raised. but i love me some routine. yep i like to switch it up every now and again. but i like waking up in the morning with some sort of plan or something to look forward to. it helps my weeks flow a little bit more smoothly and i have less time to worry about silly things.

now combine food + routine and you will discover one of my many peculiar traits about me. no i dont eat at the same time everyday, or the same thing for every dinner on every tuesday night. its not that extreme. however, i get a little stuck. and by stuck i mean- i get obsessed with a food and eat in routinely over and over until i get sick of it and then i find something new.

allow me to disect just a bit. when i was in elementary school, not sure what grade- i became obsessed with bacon! oh man did i love it. and so i would have my mom buy it for me and i would cook it in the microwave just about every day and then watch some arthur while i was at it. i was addicted to it. i ate it and loved it so so much. then one day after my bacon obsesh had started to fizzle, my mom suprised me and brought home some bacon (creepy how that just sounded). i looked at her like duh didnt you know, "i dont like bacon anymore mom" whaaaat? how was she supposed to know? well she was- i was simply over my bacon streak.

after the bacon it was the german pancakes, it was the only thing i knew how to make- and so i made it once a week. then it was waffle crisp, then nutella and bananas down at dixie, then it was the rice sides, then eggs on toast the first year down at provo, then cottage cheese with bbq chips, then the fire cheetos streak occured, oh and cant forget the blueberries (still kinda obsessed still). you see- ive been through it all. i eat it all the time. everyday, couple times a week, once a week at least. and it usually lasts for a couple months at a time. until i simply just wear my little taste buds out with the same freaking taste over and over again. then i dont eat it for months again. then the cycle begins again. i try it again about 6 months later and im like- OH MY GOSH I CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT HOW GOOD EGGS ARE!? and you know what happens next.

so my current obsession right now...waffles. i may or may not have had them 3 times in a week before i went to mexico and that was the first thing i made when i came home. im obsessed with making people waffles as well. its probably not the best thing to be addicted to- especially when i fill each crater with butter and then top it off with straight sugary syrup. but i cant help it....once im addicted- i just cant get enough (thank you black eyed peas).

so im not sure what it will be next. or when my waffle obsesh will end but i can tell you this- i will be having waffles tmrw while we watch the bachelorette! cant wait for this season to start :)

thats all. i dont know what my deal is- but when i love something, i REALLY love it. like really a lot. too much for my own good. a big shout out and thank you to my taste buds for putting up with me.

now try and honestly tell me you arent gonna make waffles this week....? my mouth is watering and my stomach is growling from these delightful photos. i need to stop now.

this or THAT

2011-05-19T01:27:00.001-06:00

this past week i was in mexico. and we played a lot of "would you rather" or "this or that". i am sorta obsessed. i think its so interesting to see what people choose- it tells so much aboutt hem with one simple answer. like for example, chocolate or vanilla? no question- choc all the way. but my vanilla peeps all the sudden seem like a different species to me. i find it so interesting that they would actually choose vanilla white cake over a delish chocolate one! baffles me. but i love the differences we all have- its what makes us unique. i decided to continue with some more questions and that was you can get to know me just a tad more ya digg.

Staying up all night or going to bed early? considering its almost - i should say staying up. BUT i wish i went to bed early.

Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream or oreo ice cream? honestly im not a big ice cream fan, but id rather have cookie dough than oreo.

Roses or lilies? lilies

Relationship or one night stand? relationship. obvi

Unicorns or horses? unicorns if they were realisies.

Tigers or lions? lions. cus it starts with L. just like me.

Kiss or cuddle? kiss

A romantic night in or a night out at the club? romantic night in.

Guitar or drums? guitar

Summer or winter? summer

Being loved or feared? loved duh!

Lust or love? love

Revenge or acceptance? acceptance

Sweats or jeans? lounge- sweats. out- jeans.

Christmas or Thanksgiving? xmas

Hot or cold weather? hot, boil me if you please

Being short or tall? i guess short.

get stepped on by an elephant or get beat up by a leprauchaun? leprauchaun. he's just a little guy right?

drink a shot of lemon juice or smell like poop for a week? tough....lemon juice. (sarcasm to the max)

eat an entire watermelon or get really bad sunburn? okay jennifer gardiner. if you shall, ask her the famous would you rather HAHA. but watermelon. i wouldnt even be mad- they are good.

be blind or deaf? deaf

meet Justin Timberlake or Paris Hilton? what kind of question is this! JT!

be a professional singer or actor? singer

be able to stop time or be invisible? mmm...stop time

have six inch long nails or purple eyes? i would be pleased with purple eyes. that would be sweet.

own a two headed snake or a purple cow? cow. snakes make me dry heave.

live in California or Cancun? cali. vacation in cancun.

Orange or Yellow? yellow

black or white? black

green or Blue? sooo tough. can i have both?

Day or Night? day

Vanilla or Chocolate ice cream? infamous. chocolate

Cake or Brownies? mmm...a good cake.

Several small houses in different places or a mansion? several small if they are legit places

TV or Computer? computer. just watch tv on it.

Smile or Laugh? smile AND laugh

Dog or Cat? dog dog doogggg

Pepsi or Coke? coke please

Caramel or Butterscotch? butterscotch

Sugar Cookies or Snickerdoodles? sugar cookies. but snickerdoodles are delish

Disney or Cartoon Network? disney! woot.

MTV or TLC? tlc as of late.

Country or Rap? a little bit of both.

Comedy or Horror Movies? i refuse to watch scary movies. so comedy.

Wheat or White bread? wheat.

English Muffin or Bagel? love both

Pizza or Pasta? mmm...yikes both.

Pumpkin or Pecan Pie? pumpkin :)

Snow or Rain? rain

Mexican or Chinese Food? mexican. but i love me some chinese!

youngin beauties francisco lachowski or j biebs?

thaaas it.

xoxxx

little celebrations.

2011-05-05T13:14:00.002-06:00

i have a few things i want to kinda sorta celebrate, ya know? nothing huge- just small things that i could overlook but instead i want to recognize them and celllebrate of course!

first.

i moved home all my stuff from provo yesterday. now i have nothing to worry about being in two places. i wont have to do it later this summer and im officially moved out :)

second. 

in the process of moving out all my stuff- guess what little gem i found under my bed?! yep you guessed it!! MY CAMERA USB CONNECCCCTOR CORD. was i the happiest girl ever? yes. was i by myself but still squeeled? yes! i had decided earlier this week that i was just going to buy a new one for my trip, but i dont have to now! speakigof trip..which leads me to my next celebration....

third.

im going on vacation! for a much much needed getaway. i cant wait to do absolutely nothing for a week but sit in the sunshine and enjoy mounds of mexican food. hallelujah!

fourth.

i finished the first section of chalean extreme. its split into three months- and if i was good and did it every single day like i should than i would have been finished with the first month circut a while ago- but im still just proud of my self to have kept it up! onto my second months circuit! woot.

fifth.

im starting to get better at managing money. so maybe im not "good" at it. but ive had a couple classes from my dad about interest and principle and all that stuff that i just am terrible at understanding- BUUT i am getting better at it. yeah i bought a swim suit the day i got my paycheck- but this will come with time...at least im learning. thats something to celebrate about.

happy cinco de mayo folks.

and if you dont care about the 5th of may, find something simple to celebrate today :)

cant.live.w/out.

2011-05-02T22:57:00.000-06:00

so lets see- i could blog about the royal wedding, or even the death of osama bin laden HOWEVER, im not going to. although they are both great and interesting and historical- its refreshing to hear something new right? right. so say hello to a new topic for the moment.

since ive been at a lack of inspiration to base my blog posts about lately, i decided i would resort back to my 6th grade auto bio. im quite please i still have it actually- and one day i will have to post the self portrait i drew on the cover. amazing. todays topic is "My list of items i couldn't live without". pretty intense and intimidating question now that i look at it. but 12 year old lauren went to work on that list.

12 year old lauren:

my list.
1. my family
2. my friends
3. a cozy bed (top three?...ive always loved my sleep what can i say?)
4. my dog, hailey
5. my house
6. clothes
7. the beach
8. disneyland
9. books
10. my boat (i didnt not own it...yet it was "my" boat?)
11. mountains
12. Europe (i was infatuated with europe)
13. music
14. shoes ( a little young to be so materalistic)
15. animals
16. people
17. dance
18. my teachers
19. my blanket (heck yes this made the list!)
20. stuffed animals ( now that seems a little more realisitc for a 12 year old)

since i only did 20 i decided to do 20 again. because if i have no limit- i will go on for days. and daysssss. the list could go on ya know.

21 year old lauren.

my new list of 20 things i couldnt live without.

1. family
2. the gospel
3. zachary
4. friends
5. food. ( why did i not put this before...its a given!)
6. a home.
7. animals (including miss helly)
8. education
9. technology (whatever. its great)
10. beauty supplies (hair, make up essentials...im lame i get it)
11. transportation
12. the BEACH. still made it to the list
13. fashion (clothess, accessories, yadayada)
14. reading matericals (books, magazines)
15. music
16. SUNSHINE. makes me so happy!
17. love
18. vacations.
19. creativity and using that in my workk
20. people. ( just other people makes the world interesting!)

i cant say that i thought very long about my list- cus honest it was just off the top of my head. but i realized that stuffed animals arent a neccessity in my life anymore- but my blanket almost made the cut again. my dad saw it the other day and the netting inside is all packed into one corner and he just started laughing. he held it up and it looked all see-through and asked what we could do to fix it. dont worry me and my mother have already got this planned! im getting a new netting for it so that it will feel like new. my family knows how much it means to me- which im grateful for cus i do realize its nappy and irrational. BUT i dont care :) not one bit. there are some things you just love and will always love. those are some of the few things i couldnt live without.
what are some things YOU cant live w/out?

just predictions.

2011-04-26T01:07:00.001-06:00

remember when i brought up that autobiography that i wrote in 6th grade? well i decided to pick it up tonight- reread some, and do my own 21 year old version of one of the topics.

i decided i would put my old one first- just for kicks.

10 predictions for my future.

in my 6th grade mind.
1. i will graduate from college (didnt happen)

2. i will get married (still have hope)

3. i will become a mom (hopefully one day)

4. i will live in utah or somewhere warmer (vauge. but currently doing so)

5. i will go to BYU (does living in provo count?)

6. i will become a teacher (or a hairstylist...close right?)

7. i will play the guitar (i quit the only instrument i played the very next year in 7th..)

8. i will get a jeep wrangler (does a jeep cherokee count...close enough?)

9. i will be in the dance company at east (tried out every year- failed every year)

10. i will travel all over europe (there is still time!)

so you see...my predictions werent completely on the right track, but they werent all that wrong. just a few things have changed. i realized then tha i just put the things down that all my sisters were doing because i thought i was going to be exactly like them. while i do love my sisters so much- im not them, im me...and because i followed my heart, it lead me to where i am today. even though that meant dropping out of college and going a completely different direction. anywho- i decided to make a few more predictions...from my view now- here goes!

my 21 year old mind.

1. i will get married to my best friend and love of my life. ( decided to keep that same one, but add some spunk to it.)

2. i will travel to africa (have to one day)

3. my hair will one day be long and be all mine! (i realize this is vain. you should realize that i dont really care- i pray for my sad dry brittle hair on a daily)

4. i will become successful in my trade (yep my dad called it that the other day and i felt very grown up- so im stickin with it)

5. i will move out of utah. even if its just for a short time. ( i dont mind if i end up back in ut. but i would love to experience life somwhere new for a minute or two)

6. i will own my very own golden retriever. ( i know this is specific- but its the one dog me and zach completely agree on. so therefor, i hope one will make it into my future!)

7. i will make a difference in the world. (a big enough difference that i could possibly start my own foundation, or at least be a big part of one)

8. i will become braver and more confident in life. (i hope that over time i will just get better and better at that)

9. one day i will have a regular bedtime of 9 pm and be an early riser. (dont know when that day will come...but i hope it will)

10. i will be happy and grateful no matter what trials, pains, and challenges the future brings into my life.

welp folks. i guess we will just have to wait and see what the future holds. but im excited to see- until then, im just going to love the present and enjoy the ride.

realize.

2011-04-24T23:53:00.000-06:00

disclaimer: this post says the word "realize" in it more than a normal amount of times. ive "realized" it gets repetitive... but thats why im warning you now- so that you will "realize" that before you start wondering and getting annoyed...yeah.

ive come to realize somethings this past week that i thought i should bring to surface. perhaps after getting them out- i will fill better and be able to move on. think about something else. ya know.

first realization: it is almost the end of the month. bout a week or so left. and this is my 5th blog post this month. ive realized that ive been slacking at blogging lately. im the only one who cares- but i realize that i should get a move on it.

ive realized: that everyone has a word that they just cringe when they hear. ya know those words that just sound horrible and you dont like to say them? like "moist" or "pus". well i discovered my least favorite word. i dont even know if i can write it because then ill say it out loud in my head and cringe...but here goes...."belly". ya know when people call their stomach that instead? thats just weird. i feel like a "belly" (cringe) is just a funky word to say anyways. maybe ill get over it one day. but as of right now...i dont like it.

as i was watching a show this week, i realized that charmin commercials make NO sense. allow me to explain. you know the charmin commercials- been around a while now. the little bear gets toilet paper bits stuck to his little fur bum. the momma bear tells him he has left over tp on him and then the commercials proceeds to tell you to buy cha cha cha charmin! hold up. hoold your horses. i dont know about you- but ive never had left over toilet paper bits just chillin.... have you? has that ever been a problem when deciding what tp to buy? 'oh cant get anything other than charmin because it will break up into little tiny bits and get caugh on my furry bum' what the heck? i dont understand their motive with those commercials. i just really dont. and i dont know why i havent brought this up in discussion with anyone before now- why has no one questioned that commmercial? i dunno but its weird and makes no logic sense.

ive realized that im in need of a getaway. while everyone else went on spring break- i stayed home. and let me tell ya, i got the traveling bug. so i decided to do something about it. i planned a last minute vacation and lets just say- i can not WAIT to see the sunshine and have it kiss my pale glowing skin. halle freaking lujah! i realized that sunshine is just the medicine to make the soul happy.

i have realized that i NEED to get a camera cord. or simply- i just want a whole new camera. but for now, i need a cord. because im sick of having zero pictures. its getting verry frustrating. do i just suck up and buy a new usb cord? or keep lookinggggg for my old one and see if it eventually shows up. i know the minute i buy a new one, ill find my old one. just how its works ya know.

ive come to realize that i really miss monday night bachelor. it was an excuse for me to see all my girfriends once a week and i had something to look forward too as well. lets just say- i cant WAIT for the bachelorette to start. i dont care how ridic the show is- it is PURE entertainment.

i realized that ive changed my mind. remember when i said that i think it would be interesting to be a celeb for a day? i take that back. i watched country strong this past week and i never ever want to be famous. it looked so awful! her poor life was a mess and although she had fame and fortune- behind the stage and front- she was just a hot mess. it made me really think how many celebrities live like that? i know they dont all have marriage and drinking problems. but you see how many marriages fail and how many of them go into their crazy party mode and you cant help but feel a little sorry for them. it would not be an easy life to live. and i really just had a crappy feeling after watching that movie. side note: i loved the music. but i feel like i can hardly listen to the soundtrack without think of the movie in general and then i feel crappy again...im just grateful that i dont live that lifestyle.

and last but not least- ive realized that i have life soo good. i really do have so so much to be grateful for. life isnt easy- being happy 24/7 is not easy, but once i put things into perspective i realize that i have been given so much and have ooddles and mounds to be thankful for. im a blessssssed girl indeed.

hurr.

2011-04-14T17:48:00.000-06:00

today i wish my hair was long and real as evvver. lucious and long long long....
dreaming of the day when that will MAYBE happen.
until then- thank you for extenchies.
thatss all.

balancing.

2011-04-14T00:37:00.001-06:00

im not trying to avoid my blog- its just been neglected. as well as chalean. and my daily baths- which meant smoothe legs everyday. for the past couple months you see- ive created my own routine without having other things getting in the way too much. now that im no longer jobless and are going to classes and such- ive lost my entire routine. i didnt mean to throw it completely out the window- it just happened! and i am certainly not proud. nope. i need to somehow mesh my old routine with my new schedule. balance is a hard thing i tell ya. i have yet to master it. and im sure no one really does it perfectly no matter how hard they try. my new goal is to make time for= enough sleep, chalean, baths/shaving my legs HA!, workyy, classes, family, zachary, my cute friends, church, and me time. that sounds like a good place to start. once i got that down- i can slowly add to my list. some people are so talented and can squeeze crafts and baking in their too- ONE day i tell myself...one day i will be to that point.

ive gotten much better at not loosing things by the way. its slowly but surely improving. i just realize i can find everything in my purse if i loose something. that thing is DEEP and i swear it can hold more than mary poppins bag! however, ive picked up a new horrid habit. meet- the clumsiest of all clumsies. everything i touch flings out of my hands. for example- yesterday as i was turning off my pandora radio (grrr) my phone went leaping out of my hands and landed crassssssshing onto the cement. hello shattered screen. then today in blowdry class i set my blowdryer down, pick it back up and BAM it falls to the floor- breaking in half- exposing all of its electrical wires. bronzer= drop on ground now a million pieces...blah blah blaaaaah. whats up with that? i am notttt feeeling this new h.h. (horrid habit) at all. i need to velcro everything to my hands!

well enough of that nonsense- i just wanted to talk about my newest obsesh. blueberries! my mom buys me a big box everyweek on her costco run on saturdays and they last me till about tuesday. i devour those suckers. i never liked blueberries until like a month ago cus i was always trying the gross ones. who knew! i love em.

today me and my friend josphen went to lunch and then to barns and nob and just sat and looked at magazines for a good long minute. we soaked up every photoshoot and discussed our dream wardrobes. it was quite lovely. cept the fact that our bench was a teeter toter really- and we talked louder than most people but i didnt even mind cus its not a library right? i liked it.

well i know thats nothing too exciting but its the beginning of getting my life back on track. routine routine routine. here we come!

oh ps. follow me on twitter?

@lparker23

laaadeeedaa

2011-04-05T23:35:00.000-06:00

woah. that is the only word to describe my life events as of late. i feel like ive been going going going non stop this past week and havent even had a minute to catch my breath. ive loved it though. anywho im back and hopefully with some fun things to say.

just a couple topics i need to touch on...

first of all..on sunday i dug up an old project from 6th grade- my autobiography. my family got a kick out of it as well as myself...i was such a nerd-- not a thing has changed! each page has a promt such as : my life without tv, or my favorite family tradition or just 10 things i will do in my future- ya know, some guidelines for my 6th grade mind to work with. however im thinking i might recreate it. i know its kind of like a challenge- but my sister came up with the idea of comparing the two just to see the changes ive made and to look back on. not a bad idea eh? it does have some great topic choices and i would for sure have to share some of my great one liners from my 6th grade version- they are pricccceless. you know what- im just gonna share one right now. it was my auto bio poem. its covered in lip kisses and it goes a little something like this...

"Lauren.
Happy, loving, silly and cute.
daughter of Jared and Marsha.
sister of Nicole, Adrianne, Ashley, Courtney and Naomi.
lover of dance, wakeboarding and shoes.
who feels lively, lucky and special.
who finds happiness in acting, dancing and boating.
who needs a brother, a pool and a bunny.
who gives smiles, gifts and happiness.
who fears spiders, heights, and snakes.
who would like to see the eiffel tower, me dance a solo, and my sister have a baby.
who enjoys skiing, dancing and being with friends and family.
who likes to wear a smile, red shoes, and abercrombie shirts.
resident of SLC on Laird Drive.
Parker."

i cried. i mentioned dance about 10 times and to top it off- the abercrombie shirts. hahaaaaaaa!! ohh my goodness. so great- i dont think ive laughed so hard.

secondd....for some reason on sun i had lots of good chats. one consisted of something that has been on my mind lots. PDA. like i am no judge of what you wanna do. by all means- to each his/her own. i know me and zach used to make soph quesy. ya know i just dont really care in the long run. however....! does anyone else feel like pda at church is a LITTTTLE much? ya i get it- you guys like eachother... but do you need to give your husby a scalp massage during conference? or are you THAT tired that you must lay down in his lap? or does your bach ache that much that you need a full on massage- that travels every inch of your back? i kid you not ive seen it all. kissing included. i think everytime the couple in front of me at church has a love fest, i turn to everyone on my row with a deer in the headlights look. haha i cant help but laugh. i dont care what people do with their significant other- but i feel like you can withhold your desire to sit on eachothers laps for three hours while at church? hold hands people, then when you get home you can kiss and give scalp massages all you want. however it does add much entertainment- and distraction. all i can focus this random couple rather than the speaker. haha love is just in the freaking air!

thirdd....im not gonna lie. im addicted to pandora. yeah its like the biggest part of my life right now. i cant get over how smart of an idea it is! ive liked it for a while but you really have to find your station before you fall in love- right? yeah well i found my station and it is too good to be true. i used to switch it up but i dont think ive changed it for about a month. santigold is my freaking GO TO! it blows my mind every day. i cry cus im so happy. in my room, in my car- everywhere- pandora serenades me with its sweet sweet tunes. and its great that you can like combine stations?! i havent got that crazy yet- but i think im gonna try it...cus that sounds like too much fun i simply cant miss out on fun like that. anywho if your feeling like a dare devil- turn on santigold radio and let it bless your ears.

fourth.
i have a new bff. we hang out every day. her name is chalean. shes my trainer. yeah so weve never met in person- but she knows me so well and i laugh at all her jokes- shes funny. and pretty and buff. and yeah we work out and were homies. no but really- remember that work out vid i started? yeah its changed my life. i am usually so lazy at working out. but NOT anymore. cus chalean and me go hard and put in 100% erraday. i feel as if she can hear me. one time she did...it was so weird. shes all...on a scale of 1-10 how are you gonna work out today? and i was like TEN and yelled it at the tv. and she goes, i think i heard a ten from you. i laughed. and she has hidden cameras in my house and tells me when im slacking and need to just KEEEP GOING even when it burns. anywho- i know love working out. and its a diff video everyday so it really is like we hang out, cus she changes her outfit. i suggest if you suck at working out and getting your butt to the gym- like me- you should call chalean. she would LOVE to be your friend too! shes really nice and will probably have hidden cameras in your house too. really though- i look forward to seeing her everyday and working up a sweat with her. im gonna buy turbo jam as well so i can see her in MORE outfits! shes such a gem- i like friends like her. she makes me want to be a better person ya know? such a great influence on my life.

yeah i just typed my brains out. onto this little blog of mine that ive neglected. i really do appreciate anyone who reads this though- for reals you are great. continue reading and i hope i could add a little something something to your day. smile and be happy. and to take something for the road- a quote i heard today and really stuck....

"i believe life is 10% what happens to me, and 90% of how i react to that"

adios!

night.

2011-04-04T01:11:00.000-06:00

i have many thoughts running through my head right now.
i havve lots of things i want to blog about.
but im tired and know that blogging is not a fast ordeal.

so im saving it for tmrw.
i may or may not have a mouthful to say.

anywho- today i am grateful. for life in general and the amount of blessings i have. i am beeeyond blessed.

thats all. come back manana for more sass and opinions and thoughts.

3 thoughts.

2011-03-31T01:01:00.000-06:00

thought 1.

With b spears new cd coming out it's made me think a little about her crazy life. One of my favorite websites did the honor of showing the two sides of brit that we are spectators see- the glammed version that took a team to beautify ms spears and the style craving white trash train wreck. Brits def not known for her amazing style- cus girl don't got any. I still love her, I just can't imagine not having a stylist if I was that rich. Anywho- I love Brit, but the poor girl has had one crazy life. I remember being in high school when she was going down the toilet drain thinking she was going to commit suicide of die of an overdosed before I turned 20. Luckily she changed her ways- from what we know...and things are starting to look up again.

Lots of celebs that have grown up in the limelight have seriously struggled. Drugs, crazy outbursts- you know the drill. Lindsay lohan, Miley, britt, xtina, mk olsen, Michael Jackson...so on and so forth (maybe everyone except hil duff?) . With a few exceptions- they all, at some point of their life, have made an extremely wild turn. I honestly feel bad for them- because I can't imagine how hard it would be to be in their shoes. To have everyone stalk your life, write about you in every magazine and analyze your decisions would be hard hard hard! anyways- my main thought was that i really hope none of this crazyness happens to justin biebs. i really sincerely think that. i worry about him. and i just really hope and pray that the lifestyle of a celeb doesnt ruin him. it would be so sad to see him grow up and turn into chris breezy who beats his gorgeous gf or kanye whose head is to big for this earth. ya know? like i just hope he stays grounded and doesnt let this all get to his head. im not saying i want him to stay perfectly squeeky clean but id like to imagine him staying pretty norm norm.

ps. if he asked me out on date, id say yes. and we would hold hands.

thought 2.

ive got the worst most severe case of the sweet tooth. after evvvverything i eat- must be followed up with a treat. brownies, cookies, marsh mellows, cadburry eggs, lindors, sour watermelons. yeah those are all at my house. that doesnt help. my main problem is that i cannont eat a meal or even snack for heavens sake, without a follow up treat. and its just so convenient that their is candy just laying around every corner of my house and in my purse and every where i turn. today i had a twinkie. ill just end this thought with that right there. a twinkie. enough said. moving on...

thought 3.

once upon a time i used to not like the bath. k well i liked it, but i didnt LOVE it. and to be honest i took one like verrry rarely. this past december i got so so sick for like over a week and everyday to make myself feel better i would get into the bath. multiple times a day. it was like medicine and for some reason it made climbing into bed so much better and relaxing. well once i got better- the baths didnt stop. ever since then ive taken a bath almost every single day. sometimes twice a day. i get in the mornings, at night, in the middle of the day. whenever i want. especially if im cold. and this is the weird thing- i dont even get in for very long. just like 15 minutes and im out. but im literally addicted and i crave them. zach has always told me he loved the bath and to be honest i was like- k weirdo just shower! but now i know! now i know that they are addicting and so soothing. and sometimes i fill it with bubbles galore just like the movies. my next step is a million candles PLUS the bubbles..and a magazine. to be JUST like the movies. i just got to learn how to enjoy putting my shoulders under the water- im not there yet. its too claustrophobic.

alrightie thats it.

tlc

2011-03-27T19:36:00.000-06:00

by far the weirdest/more interesting shows are on TLC. from hoarders to toddlers and tiaras and EVVVERYTHING in between, there are some crrrazy shows. and really they suck you in like your under a spell. you could waste hours sitting there watching people eat strange things and 3 year olds get spray on tans. my thought is- where does TLC find these people? really. do these people know they have a 'strange addiction' and so they apply? does their neighbor suggest them? why would you want people to know you eat glass? or that you need an intervention? i always wonder how people end up on strange shows like that. there are even weirderrrr shows that i dont know how people get on, or want to be on- like wife swap? anywho! the diversity you see in people from watching TLC shows can be mind boggling. the show that has seriously drawn me in the most is that new coupon show, Extreme Couponing!

let me tell you- these ladies (mostly ladies...and their poor husbands) are obsessed with collecting coupons or aka "couponing". they spend hours a day online, looking through the paper, digging in the recycle bins, etc- collection TONS of coupons. then- on their shopping day, they get allll ready for a long day at the grocery store. they fill carts FULLL of food. like hundreds of butterfingers, pastas, sauces, cereals. and like i mean hundreds. not just 24. like 412 boxes of pasta. this one couple filled up NINE shopping carts chuck full of food. then they head to the cashier. (let me just say that if i was that cashier i would probably quit right then and there) the checkout process lasts over and hour...sometimes up to THREE hours JUST checking out food. their totals go anywhere from 200-900 dollars of groceries. they then scan the coupons....and BAM! 200 dollars worth just turned into 3 bucks. 900 dollars into 34 bucks. they walk out of the store with HUNDREDS of dollars worth of food for free.

i sat there in awe. like dang that is freaking smart and they get way good deals, but hello- thats all these people care about! they spend their entireeee days planning for their shopping trip. and really- who is gonna eat 400 boxes of pasta? some of the crazy couponers let their neighbors come get food from their storage if they are struggling- which i thought was super nice. buuuut its just straight crazziness all together. yet- i cant help but stare and keep watching :) another problem is they can only buy stuff that they have a coupon for...sucks if you want to get a box of blueberries.

anywho, although the show is a little ridic- it is super entertaining. it really boggles my mind how many intense crazy people there are in the world. it makes life so much more interesting- yet it makes me happy that im not wasting my life away couponing- but geeze they are getting one heck of a deal!!

confesh. sesh.

2011-03-24T16:27:00.001-06:00

my favorite types of music bounce around from time to time. although i like a wide variety, i have my main genres that i like. ive kinda ventured from hip hop, or anything super pop but if i find a fantastic song i embrace and love it whole heartidly. im not a big fan of the overplayed radio songs (thank you ipod) but there are always exceptions to the rules right? every now and again i turn on u92 and jam out to wiz kalifa, because it adds a little spice in my life. however, today we need to talk about my love for the one and only t-pain. im gonna give credit to zach because he has always been a fan- i havent. his first songs were weak and i def wasnt the biggest fan. howwwever- he has def stepped his game up. can i just say im a huge auto tune fan? okay so maybe every artist shouldnt use one- thats a given, however t-pain and his auto tuner are a great little combo. whenever i feel like really jamming out, i turn off my iron and wine and t-pain is my go to. and this week folks, he did NOT disappoint. this will be on repeat, mark my words.

so really thats just about it. i really enjoy me some t-pain. and i know everyone has their go-to's that are not in their average music genre- its part of adding some flavvor to your life right? everybody say thank you to t-pain for this wonderful new jam.

day fifteen.

2011-03-21T23:33:00.000-06:00

Last day of my 15 day challenge! first off. serious thanks to the people who commented and gave me ideas of little food combos to try- im going to try them all! seriously! so thanks. and if you think of more- feel free to share :)

Day 15: five good things about yourself. And five bad.

so do i get the bad part over with first or what? i think ill start with the bad so that i can try to redeem myself with the good afterwards.

5 not so good things about lauren.

1. i am NOT so patient.

to be honest its something i really struggle with. sometimes i have to remember that the time clock isnt revolving around me and my scheduale. i have to bend and compromise a lot in this area and it is noooot easy. i dont know if its because im the baby of the fam so i never had younger sibilings i had to be patient with or what. im slowly getting better- but im still below average.

2. i get offended easily.

i really try not to- i do i do. but sometimes just a small joke or someone teasing me can go too far and i break down inside. while some people can brush off anything- i cant. i wish i could be one of those people who say, i dont care if they said something about me. maybe this is because i have no brothers- but teasing (with truth to it) can actually really hurt my feelings. i get over it- but in the moment im weak and its def something im trying to be stronger about.

3. i get grumpy when im hungry.

and me grumpy? blah. if my blood sugar gets low- give me food or ill bite someones head off. k no, im not that crazy- but i feel that crazy inside! and when im super hungry- nothing sounds good. really? like why do i become so difficult? then the minute i have food back in me, im laughing and being obnoxious and talking a million miles an hour. bipolor.

4. i compare myself.

yep i do. i like myself- i think im great. but its hard with stupid facebook and stuff these days not to sit and be like, ohh her hair!dang her teeth are magnificant! she has the cutest clothesss ever! and so on and so forth. its not that im not happy with who i am, i just think its human nature for girls to envy each other at times. and to the girls who never get jealous- teach me how to do it.

5. i cut it close.

all my friends can verify this one for me. im not the most punctual. but i will say this- im not always late- cus really im not. im just not the person who is there 5-10 minutes early. sometimes im just there RIGHT on time. but this is a very stressful thing- because instead of coming in and driving over all nice, im running and speeding and hair is blowing in my face and im a mess. really? i should just wake up 10 minutes earlier? but that snooze button is magnificant....

whew! i felt like i just exposed myself to the world. yikes.

moving on.

5 good things about me.

1. i have a good heart.

i like to tell myself that i truly care about people. and for me its most obviously seen through the less fortunate. the blind, the homeless,the handicap, the extremely overweight, the crippled- it completely melts my heart. it makes me want to do everything i can to help. it would be my dream to help people or start some sort of relief fund/organization for these people who need extra love.

2. i make a special effort to be involved in all of my families life's.

having 5 sisters can be intense. we are all so different and in different stages of our life- but i realize how much of a blessing that is. i made it a goal about a year ago to have a relationship of my own with each of them and be really good friends. i hardly ever fight with my sisters anymore and i can honestly say that i stand on great terms with all of them and they are all some of my very closest friends. including my parents. i love them both equally and think they are both in my life to teach me important, yet different life lessons.

3. im a generally happy person.

there is people every where who just cant handle happy people. like my favorite mentor, Winn Claybaugh, has said- some people just dont like happy people. and thats just fine- because i cant please everyone. im pretty good at being happy, especially when im around a group of people. and when i am feeling a little down, ive gotten pretty good about out weighing those feelings with good ones.

4. i have no problem with making more/new friends.

although there are times when i get very intimdated- i really am open to being friends with just about anyone. i feel like i get along with more people than not. we might not become the best of friends- but i really have no problem with at least giving people a chance.

5. if i say it- i mean it.

and i mean this is the best way possible. if i give someone a compliment or tell them something kind- it always comes from my heart. i believe in complimenting others and if i say that i like your outfit, or that you look super cute that night- i dang well mean it with every fiber of my being. i never lie a compliment-if it isnt serious and sincere then i would rather just not have heard it. so iv made sure to be very honest and sincere about complimenting others.

not gonna lie. that was probably one for the hardest posts ive done. of course i could think of lots of weak things about myself- but its embarrasing to share. and the strengths are hard to mutter out because we are taught by society that saying good things about yourself is a sign of pride or cockiness- but i think everyone should give themselves a little praise every now and again. even if it is super hard to admit and share to the world. (theres always a regular journal to write those things in, incase you arent ready for the cyber world journal yet). well there ya have it, those are the little things that make me ME. and that is by far my most honest and vulnerable post yet.

change.

2011-03-21T00:34:00.001-06:00

today was a fine day. just a fine day indeed.

sometimes i get in weird funks or ruts when im just not that motivated. this past week being one of those times. let me elaborate, if you will.

im one of those people who remembers all their dreams. okay saying ALL might be stretching the truth- but more than 60 percent of the time, i wake up and remember my dream. i realize its quite rare, because everyone i talk to seems to remember their dreams like once in a million. not me. i remember them- and if they are weird or scary or what have you, i wake up and feel weird. have you ever had a dream where someone did something terrible to you and you wake up pissed off at them? well my dream the other day was something of the sort. it had made me feel so rotten inside that i seriously had the hardest time getting myself going that day. all i could think about was my awful dream. so right then and there i knew i needed to make a couple changes in my life.

i needed to make changes because i knew right then and there that if i had something to take my mind off of it that day, then i would be better. but i didnt have anything to motivate me. so i took a bath and thought of it some more. change change change. i needed a change. so yesterday i decided i need to give my life a little makeover. i needed to set some goals and have something to look forward to every single day to make me more MOTIVATED. so i decided to begin a work out plan. i woke up- put on some work out clothes, and headed to the family room and turned on a 3 month work out video. i worked out for a little over an hour and i was in the best mood! i just wanted to do more and more. in highschool when i did cheer and dance- i was exercising everyday. but once i graduated i just became sort of lazy. i would go to the gym every now and again- but sometimes the gym in provo can feel like a dating pool and that was the last reason i went to the gym. so this new workout video is just what i needed!

ive also decided that i need to make other small changes in my life. such as not reading a million blogs before bed- because it just makes my mind stir and then i dont sleep well. ive realized that the smallest changes are going to make the biggest differences. just an hour everyday of exercising with my homegirl chalean is already making me feel happier!

i know this is super random- because it is. but im just grateful to know how much power and control i have over my happiness. no im not on a trip for spring break, no im not somewhere tropical getting a tan- but im here at home and making the best of what ive got. there are so many times when i get frustrated and sad and feel like i have nothing to do with my days- but i can fix that. i can make my days for all that they are worth. i have complete control over making my life enjoyable even in the darkest of times.

this next week is spring break for zach- and we have decided to make it fun fun fun, even if we are just staying here. we are going to soak up slc for all that its worth. if anyone has any ideas of fun things to do in the good old 801- shout them out. we are going to make this a very enjoyable "staycation" :)

happy days to all of you. :)

food food fooooood.

2011-03-19T16:43:00.000-06:00

day 14. FIVE strange foods you eat, mix, etc.

before you judge any of these- you have to try them first. then feel free to think its gross.. but until then, you cant have any sort of opinion :)

1. mixage of the dressing.

no salad is a dandy salad until you have mixed 2 different dressing. my favorite combo is the ceaser dressing and balsamic vinegarette mix. poor some of both and BAM its delish. promiise

2. cheese and apples.

cut up the apples into thin litle slices. cut some colby jack cheese into thin little slices. place cheese on apple, devour. perfect little snack eh?

3. cottage cheese w/ bbq chips.

im not kidding- ever single person who sees me do this is like whaaaaat in the world. then i say, try it! and they like it. it sounds weird- i know, but no judging remember? i love the crispy baked bbq chips the best cus they are crunchy. but regular bbq chips work just great too. and the best brand of cottage? the western family brand in the pink cow print container. mark my wordssss.

4. grilled cheese with jam.

i know most people dip their grilled cheese in like a tomato soup or something- which is good. but i like to put jam on top of mine :) just a nice little spread of rasp. jam across the top will do the trick.

5. i am honestly stuck. i cant think of something off the top of my head right now. but if one comes up- i will be sure to post it.

does anyone else have weird food combos they like? im always down to try something new :)

hello.

2011-03-16T23:42:00.001-06:00

hi. we know i have a bad case of loosing things. my latest lose is my camera cord. the usb. ya know...the one that connects the camera to the computer. it may be because i live in two place. and so i when i take stuff to and from- i loose it along the way. whatever or however i lost it- its driving me nuts. seriously going crazy. i have not taken a picture on my camera since january. zach is probably enjoying me not saying "oooh lets take another pic" but i promise he will thank me later when we have a picture to document all the memories we had. so just so you all know- im sending out a search and rescue for my cord. im trying to post pone buying a new one because i know the minute i do- i will find it again.
that same thing happened with my license.

it went missing for months and months and so finally my mom made me get a new one. so i did. and then a week later i found my old license. so i had two. it came in hand sometimes- but they were both hideous. let me tell you this- i was so excited to get my new picture for my 21st birthday- i was going to look greaaat and get all ready and wear something cute. no. no no no. i got bronchitis- i turned into death and had to have keri go with me just so i wouldnt die or pass out basically. i got there...with greasy hair and pale sick face- they zoomed in, took the pic and overexposed it with light. can i just tell you that i look smokin? smokin gross. anywho...

now that i went off on a tangent- ive been really bad at blogging. but trying to get back in the groove of things. mainly because i want to look back on it and remember stuff. i figure i will continue my challenge cus my 15 days is almost over anyways! so lets get back to it.

day 13- 5 great inventions- (in myy mind.)

1. dvr.
tv in general is fascinating these days- but really dvr is just great. you can watch your show when you want to- fast forward the commercials- and rewind if you must re watch something again. its made watching the bachelor much more enjoyable and two shows never conflict. congratulations dvr- youre amazing.

2. car.
transportation is huge. but sometimes when im sitting in my car driving- i cant help but think- woah im like sitting in a box that is moving me from point a to point b. im also the control of this little box thing and i tell it when to go and when to stop. and look around me- lots of boxes with lots of people inside them! i know cars arent boxes- but they sure as heck could be! getting to zachs house would be a COMPLETELY different experience if i did not have a car to take me there.

3. words with friends.
all apps are great. i loved angry birds, cut the rope, sallys spa, the list could go on. however i was playing those BY MYSELF. it was just me and my phone taking over the spa world. then i would feel so lame after playing for days. but wwf i have no shame. why? because its like im playing with a friend. because i am. im playing scrabble with a friend. it makes me think and it keeps you in touch (in a way) with lots of people- friends, family, and acquaintances.

4. toothpaste.
what in the world did people do before toothpaste. before brushing your teeth was discovered. poor souls. i cannot imagine the rankness of their breath. did they just get used to it? cus that is something i could never just get used to. morning breath is horrid and some meals cant be covered with a mint of gum. BRUSH BRUSH BRUSH AWAY. i am so grateful for the invention of the tooooothpaste!

5. makeup.
good riddance to those who look perfect without it. and good riddance to the boys who hate girls who wear it...can i get a HALLELUJAH from all the girls out there that need a little make up in their lives! sure- i bet if i lived back in a time where girls didnt wear any than i would be just quite alright- BUT seeing the difference it can make WITH it on...praise makeup. i just love it. i love the colors, the accents, the texture, the depth, the matte or gloss finish, i wike it all. call me what you want, but im only human here and im no fresh out of the shower model. there are days when i dont even want to put it on- but when i do, im grateful that it is there :)

thank you. that is all.

return.

2011-03-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

challenge continued.
i took a little break form my challenge- cus i left my laptop in provo. i still dont have it yet, buttt i figured i would just blog anyways!

5 things that will win me over- in any sort of relationship.

uno. sincerity. nothing is more charming than knowing someone is being 100 percent sincere.

two. hilarious. if you can make me laugh i will seriously be a fan.

three. bieberfever. i just had to throw it in there. anyone who likes justin bieber is a friend of mine.

four. talker. seeing as that i talk a lot, i would like to have someone to talk with. stay and chat wont cha?

five. intune with their nerdiness. we all have it. dont hide it- i highly enjoy some nerd in my life. dont be afraid to make a fool of yourself :)

Originality.

2011-03-07T17:34:00.002-07:00

My name is Lauren Elizabeth Parker and there is only one of me. Let me tell you something- there is only one of everybody. It's how life was meant to be. We all have different struggles, passions, annoyances, and desires. On some levels we connect to others because we do have similarities of a sort- but no two people are the exact same. It's a blessing really. We get to create who we are and make ourselves stand out as individuals and our unique qualties are what draws people to another. So if we are so lucky to be one in 6 billion- why do we try to be someone else? Why would we want to copy what others are already doing? Why would we want to imitate another's uniqueness and creativity? Why do we yearn to be someone else instead of just improving ourselfs? And I'm not talking about what's on the outside- I'm talking about the stuff that counts here people- what's inside.

I believe in inspiration. I love learning from others and taking their thoughts and using them to better my life. I love seeing an ad in a magazine and trying to recreate it with a twist of Lauren. I love looking at the world and soaking in what I can. I love swapping good music with others to get new fresh tunes in my library.

But inspiration is not imitation. Imitation is weak. Imitation says nothing about ourselves- it says everything about someone else. It does not show people our minds. It is simply letting another person be your source of creativity and imagination. We are all born with different perspectives- if you asked a room full of people to draw a sunset, no two sunsets would look the same. Because no two people see one sunset in the exact same manner.

Why would we waste our lives that are bursting at the seams of originality, be wasted on imitation? Why should we ever think that what we like, think and see isn't as wonderful as others? Thats the beauty of it all. We are all different- and that's how is supposed to be. We werent meant to full time copy cats- or else the world would never change an grow . So embrace yourself- and make YOUR life unique and original. Because you control and shape your life...but remember you only have one- so make it good.

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. ~Judy Garland.

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. ~e.e. cummings

Almost every man wastes part of his life in attempts to display qualities which he does not possess, and to gain applause which he cannot keep. ~Samuel Johnson

There is just one life for each of us: our own. ~Euripides

Be what you are. This is the first step toward becoming better than you are. ~Julius Charles Hare

You were born an original. Don't die a copy. ~John Mason

Why try to be someone you're not? Life is hard enough without adding impersonation to the skills required. ~Robert Brault

Insist upon your self. Be original. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I WISH...

2011-03-01T20:08:00.000-07:00

that everyday could be like today.

the sun was shining. and made me skin happy.

zach and i got free cafe rio for the both of us. thank you 2 full stamp cards. which equals 20 meals? promise they arent all from us.

we sat outside with hellygurl for about two hours on my porch. every couple minutes i had to close my eyes and just take it all in. it was so simple- yet such a breath of fresh air.

between yesterday ive literally seen everyone in my family. babies and husbands and everything. every single person. and not because we had a family party- but theyve all stopped over at one point or another at my house and to be honest ive loved every face i have seen.

and now im going to see my little soph. and im going to make her go get blueberry's with me from the grocery store and purchase either elle, vogue, harpers b., or glamour....or maybe all three. and indulge in every page.

its amazing what a little sunshine can do to the soul.

embarrassed.

2011-03-01T00:51:00.000-07:00

sometimes i feel like i have nothing to blog about. yes, i do have my challenge- but sometimes i dont really feel like making a list at the moment. sometimes i feel like rambling on about nothing. but then again- thats not very fun for people to read post after post. but today im going to anyways. anywho im putting my challenge on hold till tmrw. and i will do my best to cut back on the amount of run-on sentences. i do apologize. i just write how i speak, and no one proof reads or edits these posts- so i treat it like a journ. so really, im sorry if it is hard to read at times.

sometimes im embarrassed.

embarrassed of my fake baking obsession.

lets face it- i was orange. we know this. i know this very well.

embarrassed of my snooki poof.

it was large. it held secrets. it was ugly. we know this. i know this.

embarrassed of my abercrombie wardrobe.

its sad. when i got rid of everything- i legit had to buy an ENTIRE new wardrobe because nothing was left...

embarrassed of my white lip gloss obsesh.

did i dip my lips in powdered sugar? quite possibly.

embarrassed of the way i was not as friendly and outgoing as i should have been in high school.

i didnt reach out enough. i didnt let people get to know the real me. i was labeled, and i just let it happen.

but no matter how embarrassed i am of my horrid style, look and actions- i cant take them back. i cant undo my orange tan, or take off my ed hardy flip flops. i simply cant.

i had an interesting month. well year, i guess. ive reconnected with a lot of old people from high school, or at least seen them. its hard not to remember them how they were during senior year right? its hard not to remember all the boys being ruthless and mean about my boyfriend and my "poofy" hair. its hard not to remember that some girls made you cringe. or some were awkward. or that a certain someone spread a nasty rumor about you. but how unfair is that of me to remember them as the person they were 3 or more years ago? because if i was looking from the outside in, i would be thinking- oh yeah thats lauren parker- she had an orange tan all year round, was a cheerleader so she must have obviously thought she was better than everyone else, and she had the same friends , ahem clique, the entire time she was in high school. yeah- its true. i was tan, i did do cheer, and i had a close knit group of friends. but if thats all that someone took from knowing me- than they dont know me at all. not in the slightest. what they dont know if that i thought being tan would make me feel more secure. that doing cheer would be a good way to focus my energy and time so that i wouldnt sit at home and feel bad about silly things- and because being part of something made me feel loved. and that i truly did want to make more friends, i just didnt know how- the thought of it scared me.

so my friends, what im trying to say is. im so glad we all grow up. and i realize that all the people i thought i knew in high school- i didnt know a thing about them. it was such an awkward time that im sure we wish we could take back half the things we said and did. im sure we wish we could go back and make things right- be friends with more people, judge less, worry less about what we looked like. so yeah- im embarrassed of some of the stuff in the past. but being embarrassed wont take me anywhere. i learned a valuable lesson however. everyone deserves another chance. the memories i have of people from high school are nothing but a small moment in time when people were figuring out who they were- i cant think of them in that light because im sure they have all changed. because i know i have. ive learned to love and to be friends to people who are nothing like me. ive figured out who i am- and thats much different than the person i was.

give people another chance. because, like me, im sure you would like one too.

day eleven.

2011-02-23T23:16:00.000-07:00

dont tell me you've never had a girl crush. cusss i know you have. when it comes to celebs ill do one of the three
1. love them so much that i have a girl crush.
2. yucky, not like them- because either they are not my type or im simply just too jeal for my own good.
3. dont care- dont plan to.

anywho, today im going to talk about numerooo uno. girlll crushes!! yay. i have so many its hard to narrow it down to just 5- but here goes nothing.

day 11. FIVE girl crushes.

1. Erin Wasson.
duh. of course shes lives every girls dream. model & designer. sits front row at every fashion show. stunningly beautiful in a real way. and when she was on ANTM tonight i was moooore than thrilled.

2. Erin Heatherton (whats with the name erin?)
most well-known because she is a victorias secret model. the girl is 21 years old! i figure if i could look like anyone in my next life it would be her.

3. Emily Maynard.
shes a celeb now right? if she asked zach to be her boyfriend, i would be single in a snap of a finger. i dont know a guy that wouldnt jump to her feet, actually. shes perf- sometimes its sickening to watch her every monday when im in my sweats, hair on top of my head and no makeup- but she is the nicest thing in the world so you cant help but LOVE her. uhm ps. shes 24? we would have been in highschool at the same time? no way. i feel like im 12 compared to her. moving on....

4. Jessica Lowndes.
aka Adriana Tate-Duncan from 90210. yep her character is driving me absolutely crazy as of late...well a lot of the time actually, however she is stunning. she has the prettiest eyes ever.

5. Kate Bosworth.
this is new. ive always liked her. but recently she has looked extra stunning. like the girl has two different color eyes! and blue crush will always be a fav- and she looked great the whole time even though her hair was wet- anyone that can do that is my idol. cus i looked like a drowned rat when my hair is wet :)

today is...

2011-02-22T01:23:00.000-07:00

officially zachs 21st birthday :)

just a little shout out to my bestest friend, my shopping partner, my restaurant adventurer, my listener, my puzzle helper, my advice giver, my giggly annoying crazy partner in crime, my lap to cry in, my trouble maker to give glares at, my smartie pants, my lover and my favorite person in the whole wide worrrld.

i sure do love you zachary :)

happppy birthday <3

day ten.

2011-02-20T19:27:00.000-07:00

day ten. FIVE sleeping habits.

uno.

well, first off- i like my room pitch black.

every tiny little light- muuuust be covered. ill even go to some extremes as to taping my curtains to the wall so that i dont get little slivers of light. call me craa cra.

two.

in prov- i MUST have my ear plugaroos. they are life savers. spec when people are waking up at all dif times. also, my window leads right out to university ave (do people ever stop driving?) so it makes it quiet just how its supposed to be.

treeee.

im a left side of the bed person. at home i have an entire queen but i dont even unmake the whole bed. i pull down the left side, slide in and stay 3 inches from the edge. i dont know why...but i just have trained myself to love that lefty.

four.

as mentioned in earlier posts- i adore my heating pad. i love that gem of a thing, however some nights i can go without- BUT i prefer not to go without my blankie. i love it. its old, and ratty- and i still love it to pieces.

cinco.

i just like sleep in general. i could sleep forever... so i guess i just need plentiful sleep to keep me a happy girl. sometimes if no one wakes me up i bet i could sleep for days...bad.

day nine.

2011-02-16T23:00:00.000-07:00

Day 9: FIVE random factaarooos (aka facts.)

1. in the driving world- i am better at reversing, than i am going forward.

(except sometimes its not good when you think the car is in reverse, but its still in drive, and then you hit the wall at golds gym...) but for reals- i can probably drive to provo in reverse and it would be norm norm.

2. ive recently decided that when i have my own home i will have a million and three candles. cus i really like candles all the sudden.

3. i like shopping, love looking at clothes- but like i get frustrated when i try stuff on. sometimes i wish i had a personal assistant to help me pick out a few things as an "outfit" instead of just buying lots of random stuff that doenst go togeth. (its like i want it all- but just dont know what to get)

4. lately i like doing puzzles...and i sit there for a couple hours just working away and when i connect a piece i feel like i took a drug cus im ADDICTED and just want to connect anotherrr!!

5. i talk to the t.v. cus somewhere in the back of my mind i feel as if they can hear me. its annoying i know this- but im just trying to help is all :)

enjoy my candle obsesh-ie.

(i saw on another blog how to make these little tea cup candles...and so im going to make my own. it will be my first ever "craft" HAAAH we will see how that goes. im terrible at that sort of stuff. but whatever they are cute huh? yeah me likey.)

making a change.

2011-02-14T14:33:00.000-07:00

i took eleven minutes out of my day to watch this and it changed my life. as i sat and watched this short documentary that i stubbled upon, i sobbed and as tears streamed down my face i made myself a promise right then- never again. i will never text and drive-EVER again. we've all done it- but 'done' is a past tense word...all we can control is the present and future...so put it in the past and make the choice right now- to never 'do' it.

spread the word- inspire a friend- make a change- vow to stop and help others be inspired to stop as well.

day eight.

2011-02-14T01:41:00.000-07:00

day 8. FIVE things you are thinking right now.

1. i wish i went to bed earlier- cus now im going to want to sleep all day tomorrow....

2. bless the hearts of those who post more than 2 fbook statuses a day...seriously bless their hearts cus its super annoying.

3. today was a good day. good quality time with people i adore- plus i couldnt have asked for more beautiful weather. bring on more sunshine :)

4. madeline lee hales. no matter how many years go by- every valentines day is just a heart wrenching day for me. i will never forget the impact you had and still have, on my life.

5. somedays i wish i was a little kid again. playing sims all afternoon, eating goldfish and drinking a vanilla coke- with not a single worry in the world. THOSE were the days.

day seven.

2011-02-09T23:21:00.000-07:00

day 7. FIVE things you tell yourself you will never do.

one: incorporate zebra print into my baby's clothes, room, car-seat, diaper bag, etc. it will not happen.

two: be a raunchy old lady. old people can be some of the sweetest most genuine people, until the grouchy mean one comes around. i will not be her.

three: be one of the moms that yell at the refs. okay so maybe ill quietly disagree and say stuff under my breath- but if im sitting at my child's basketball game and he gets fowled, i will not be the mom that stands up, yells a few means things and then runs at him in rage. not my thing- i will leave that to other team parents.

four: purchase a miley cyrus cd. not because i am trying to boycott her- but i just dont even think she is a a good singer! and well maybe because i dont like her too.

five: wear a pair of jeans with pink and/or white stitching that is clearly visable, along with bedazzeld jeweled pockets. you wont catch me dead. never ever.

day six.

2011-02-08T14:58:00.000-07:00

day 6. FIVE things you would wear to a party right now

well what kind of party? so last night as i was watcing the bach- i couldnt help but notice chantel o.'s awful awful dress from hell. barrrf. shes a pretty girl but she has got to get better dresses cus those animal print, skin tight, cleave bulging dresses are jsut not doing her justice. anywho i read a lot of bachelor blogs, im obsessed with it, and its been brought up that you are required to pack a certain amount of cocktail dresses- because, duh...your going to be attending lots of cocktail parties. so when i read this question- i pictured myself as a contestant, packing for my "amazing love adventure". what would you bring? some girls only make it to 2 ceremonies, some 7...plus all the date nights. geeze these girls must be buying a lotttt of dresses. however for example: britt- she didnt buy any new dresses....she is reusing old prom dresses. but thats besides the point. the point is...i picked 5 dresses that if i were in these girls shoes, i would buy and plan on wearing to the cocktail parties..

1. they had this dress in mustard yellow and a soft navy blue as well but i chose the more coral one because i think it would be the most flattering on my skin tone. (although i loved the yellow oneeee). but i think this color looks great if you are tan too...so i would save this dress until i had spent a week in tahiti..duh.

2. i likes the simple neutral color, the skinny pleats on the bottom and the fact that it doesnt hug every inch of the body, but does tie in the waist to give it some shape!

3. i dont know if its the flirty-ness of the tierred ruffles that drew me in, of the simple fresh cream color with the contrast of the black belt- but it just works for me. hair pulled up nice and sleek, maybe a few golden bangles, paired with a high black simple pump- perfect!

4. im sure some people absolutely despise their dress- because it is so different- but thats simply what i do like about it. i love the gold and green together (obvi) and i think its a nice change up from the classic dresses looks.

5. i know i chose another pastel dress that is safe. but i loved the neck on this dress plus the color is not loud or obnoxious- which i feel like a lot of the girls dresses are. its more about the detail with this dress rather than the color- and i find that more charming.

i know i didnt pick a lbd- but thats only because i know i would have many of those....these are more interesting to look at anyways. im glad the bachelor sparks some kind of light on in my brain- rather than continue to make me dumber. hahaaaa i still just love it!

*dresses courtesy of TopShop & Anthropologie.

listen.

2011-02-07T00:25:00.001-07:00

baaack by popular demand.

well maybe by just like a few people, but i felt cooler saying that.

howevvvvs-i got told to post the vid to my top 5 songs of the moment so that peeps could actually hear them. so here i am. to post the videos, so you can listen too :)

i know they arent the official music videos- cus uh i watched some and they were wack...so i thought i would spare you. you can just listen- nothing exciting is going to happen haha.

enjoy.

day five

2011-02-06T16:13:00.000-07:00

day 5. FIVE things im addicted to at the moment.

1. doodling.

if you have ever sat by me in church- you know that by the time sacrament meeting is over- the entire program is covered in words, drawins, scribbles, ideas, lists, etc. it doesnt mean im not listening- i just like to do something with my hands so that i dont get all fidgity. im a child, so what.

2. my heating pad.

usually i just love this baby during that part of the month where its a life saver- however, i now love it every day of the month, at all hours. i sleep with it on every night and its nifty because after a while it just automaticially turns off so that i dont burn a hole through my skin and cook my lungs and stuff.

3. rings.

my mom and sister told me i looked ridiculous with them all on at the same time- but i just love them all so much that i just wear them all instead of choosing a few. i recently inherited my nana's old ring and since then ive been on a kick of finding vintage and old rings. i purchased one in mexico this past xmas- and i think ill start telling people that i got it on an indian reservation from a lady who was 102 years old. just because that sounds cooler.

4. online swimsuit shopping

mind you i have like 3 in my online shopping cart - but havent bought one it. i think i probably look everyday for some more options. i guess im just like SUPER ready for summer and feel like if i buy a swimsuit in feb. then it will get super warm or something....

5. shaving

okay this sounds weird- but alow me to explain. im like a huge fan of shaving my arms. its the best thing in the world and think every girl (if you have hair on your arms, some people are naturally lucky- my mom, sophie) should shave their arms- or give it a try at least. well im obsessed and shave them just about everyday. that way i feel like they never get to the point where they are hairy again. i swear the more i shave them- the less hair grows back. i know thats not how it works, but i still feel that way. anywho- try it. cates did and she now kisses the ground i walk on cus she loves it so much.

day four.

2011-02-04T21:04:00.000-07:00

its friday night, im waiting for zachary to get off work and come play. i just got home from a busy day- which i liked, quite a lot- because on my slow days all i think about is the fact that im not doing a whole lot with my life and then i get on this weird "feel bad for lauren" kick and then i just dont like the entire day. so im glad today was busy and kept me from worrying about silly things. i played with ruby and parker all morning because ashley is out of town and they just make me so happy. i love that ruby will let me hold her and give me kisses- because she does not give them out for free...ohhh no. she is particular, and i am slowly creeping my way in to her favorite people- trust me. and parker is just the all time SWEETEST kid in the world. most little boys are rough and bratty- but parker is a sweetheart. he looked at my manicured nails and was like, "wow your nails look so pretty!" and before ashley got out of the car at the airport he simply said, "be safe on your flight mom." haha is to die for- i hope i can raise my future little boys to be as kind and sincere as he is.

challlengeee continued. (look how much better im doing. two days in a roww)

day 4. FIVE songs your addicted to at the moment.

alrighty here- lemme just tell you, i get obsessed with songs and then in a week im over it. okay maybe like two weeks. i might just do it to myself cus when i like a song- i LIKE the crap out of it and play it over and overrrr all day everyday. two weeks pass=dead to me. if i hear it, i wanna change it as soon as possible. or whats worse is when i love a song and then the radio decides to like it to, and then everyone likes it...and then on that day- i disown it as a fav and find a new song. but heres the things- every so often i get lucky, and i find a song that i really like and it never gets old. like its rare- but it does happen.

so anywho here is five fav songs as of right now. who knows what my favorites will look like in two weeks- i can promise you they will be different though.

uno. pull my heart away- jack penate.

dos. l.e.s. artistes- santigold.

tres. true affection- the blow

cuatro. walking on a dream- empire of the sun

cinco. one foot boy- mika

day three.

2011-02-03T20:57:00.001-07:00

ya i know. im like the worst challenge blogger. i tried blogging last sunday and after i spent a quality amount of time on it- it got lost forever and didnt save. so i was mad at my blog for a couple days and avoided it at all costs.

but im back- still bitter about it, but going to try and get over it the best i can.

day 3. Five favorite colors.

prelude: im more of a natural basic color girl. im trying to branch out but as i look at my closet they are all pretty neutral. so hence my color choices...
also i change my mind a lot. so at the moment, like as in TODAY, these are my favs.

Black: because its simple. looks good on everyone & everything. esp. cars. pmts has me addicted.

Gold: Shiny, sparkly, rustic, vintage, beaten, dull, bright- whatever it is. i like it.

Green: decided to add a pop of color. its not raiding my closet- but i wouldnt mind a few more green things. plus i like all shades of green. from grass, to olive, to sea-foam. and its the color of my eyes so i feel like i got to have a soft spot for it.

Gray: prob my go-to color. me and gray are dating and im quite obsessed. and just like green- i like all shades of gray. and not in just clothes- i like it in interior, accessories, polish, decor. give me graaaay!

White: fresh, clean, pure and is always a color that will continue to be a staple. i like that its making a huge comeback in the interior design world- plus a white tee never faileth ya know?

Two.

2011-01-28T00:11:00.000-07:00

Day 2. Five things you did today

One: went to the gym. This is big for me. Because normally I go like once every two weeks. But I went two days in a row! So impressive! Go me.

Two: took a bath. After the gym of course I decided to reward myself with a nice hot bath. And some cheerios while i was at it.

Three: went to lunatic fringe. To shadow and assist like I usually do every Friday and Saturday. But I can't go this weekend so I decided to go today instead:)

Four: gave Susan a haircut. I'm lucky- because not only do I have the bestest friends in the world, but my friends have fabulous mothers! So I got to spend an hour just with robyns mom Susan and chat with her about life. So fun to see her and just catch up!

Five: went to the gas station with zachary. I feel like we are always filing our cars up with gas- we drive a lot. Between Provo, Murray and salt lake we are little commuters. Zachs a gem though- he always fills my car up for me so that I don't have to get out of the warm car. It's a small gesture but it makes me happy. Sometimes I'll roll the window down though and talk to him so that he doesn't get lonely. Haha:)

-ps I left my computer charger in Provo so I've been doing my posts from my phone. Hence my picturless posts. Boring I know. Nothing pretty to look at. It's like a book without pictures. So I'll be posting pictures once I get it back. Cus I know some people don't even read they just look at the pictures. Trust me I know - I'm the same way.

Okay thas it. I'm trying to keep my days with stuff to do so that I don't get bored and realize I'm not doing too much with my life. But my hopes are high- send good karma my way:)

new challenge.

2011-01-26T19:28:00.000-07:00

SO. i decided i wanted to start another blog challenge. so i am.
its just a short one. about 15 days to be exact. the theme is in 5's.
you'll see what i mean.

so why waste anymore time. less get it started shall we.

day 1. FIVE things you could eat every day.

one- watermelon.

its like, you can eat tons and you dont feel full ya know? its like straight delish water basically. i really like it. and i really like the summer time when you always have it in the fridge. sometimes i like to cut it in half or so- grab a spoon and just dig in. i dont even mind the seeds- ill eat the crap outta them.

two- cheese.

string. slice. shredded. i like it all. its by far the greatest. if you didnt notice- all good food has cheese in it. for example: nachos, pizza, enchiladas, raviollis, even salad. its a staple.

three- texas roadhouse rolls.

when they are steaming hot and you put that delicious cinny butter on it? heck ya id eat that every single day no question.

four- frenchie toast.

id be happy if i woke up every morning and there was just french toast to great me, with homemade syrup and maybe some powdered sugar on top. im not trying to get tooo demanding but some o.j. on the side would suffice.

five- im just gonna have to say the dodo.

like i know i dont shut up about it. but theres a reason. so i couldnt just say the turkey sandwich, cus i want the whole meal- i have to get me that banana cream cheescake too. okay ill stop talking about it now...maybe ill go pick some up? tonight? moving on...

got it.

2011-01-24T20:27:00.001-07:00

Ohhh uhm- just in case you were wondering, cus I know everyone is- it's been the number one worry on your mind, I got my banana cream cheesecake. I ordered my dinner and said- save me a piece of that delish goodness cus I will buy it and I will devour it and love every minute of it. And the waiter said you got it! And I did just that- I let everyone try it though just so they knew what kind of cloud I was floating on- cloud 9 to be exact. They were jealous. And they will all go get it next time they are at the dodo- bet me on it.
Because I'm a nice girl- I saved my last third of the pie for me little friend zacharias. He bowed down to me and I added 10 points to my scoreboard. And he earned 4 points by letting me have a bite, even though I had given it to him. He soo nice.

I'll probably go and get it again this week
Cus I feel like it at all hours and minutes of the day.

p.o.w

2011-01-24T15:02:00.000-07:00

i like old jewlery. i like rummaging through my moms old drawer of stuff and wearing my grandmas vintage watches and rings. one of my very favorite bracelets is my mom's p.o.w. bracelet. i had no idea what it was when i first saw it- but it drew me in from the start. she told me that during the 60's and 70's, everyone would buy these bracelets in honor for the "prisoners of war" and soldiers missing in action during the vietnam war. you would wear the bracelet with the persons name on it, in hopes they would return safely.

whenever i wear my bracelet- which is everyday, people ask me what it is and what it means. so the other day when i was talking to my buddy chris at lunatic fringe- he asked me if the guy was ever found. i didnt know. i really had no idea if he was still alive or not. so that night i did my research. i looked up Captian Wayne Irsch and to my surprise, found out a lot about him- including a picture.

i read stories about how this man was 31 years old, from Oklahoma. he was married and was in the air force, a captian in fact. on January 9th 1968, he was set off on a combat mission with another one of his fellow pilots and their plane crashed in Laos after being hit my enemy fires. his body was never found.

i know its kind of silly but after i read the story and saw the picture of this mysterious man on my bracelet, i felt some weird connection to him. instead of just a name, he was a person. a real person with hopes and dreams and likes and dislikes- and he died serving his country and left a family behind. it all became much more real to me.

i dont know this guy, i dont know his family or anything else- but i like him- and i hope to meet him one day and until then- ill wear my little p.o.w. bracelet to show that i support all those who are fighting for our country.

yum

2011-01-20T20:47:00.000-07:00

two weeks ago I went to the dinner with zachary. we have our usual spots and so ya know, we went to the dodo. yumm yum yum. i introduced zach to my new fav dessert (thanks to A) banana creme cheeescake pie! zachs not a huge dessert person- but he LOVED it.

so a week goes by and we go on a group date and where do we go? the dodo. i just cant get enough. so me and zach are stoked on getting our pie- and right before we order our din, they cross our banana cream cheesecake off the board- meaning it was out for the night. we were bummed but it was still fantastic.

now the weekend is almost here- dont judge but im already planning on going to the dodo on saturday....3rd weekend in a row. haha to celebrate sophies birthday we are eating at our favvvorritest place in the world and just so you all know- before i even order my dinner, im saying- hi, im ordering a banana cream cheesecake so save it for me- k thanks.

i wish the dodo was my kitchen- id eat it 3 times a day, 7 days a week.

i just like food.

tricky trickkky

2011-01-18T23:31:00.001-07:00

one of mine and zachs favorite commercials is the Bosley ones. Every time they come one, we roll over in laughter! why you ask? becasuse they are BEYOND ridiculous. the commercial is for hair loss product and the before and after pictures they show are HILARIOUS. like i dont know who they are trying to fool, these arent even the same people?! unreal. so unreaaaal. please bless.

this guy got younger as well as getting hair...

maybe if we tilt his head differently then no one will notice its a different guy?

hmm...the turned face throws us off.

uh...this guy doesnt even have the same color eyes?!!

i get a kick out of this stuff- it makes life so much better.

i am....

2011-01-17T16:23:00.000-07:00

REALLY really excited for the bach tonight!!

and soph is even going to make a "bach" of cookies. (at least she said she was) and yeah i totally made up that little pun. off the top of my unshowered head.

i don't when exactly the bach became two hours but i can say that its the best idea they ever had. its like a dang movie! and yes its the highlight of my week. im counting down the hours for my two favvvies to have their one on one dates tonight!! yayayayayay!

k yeah im obsessed, so what.

ps. still upset that keltie is gone cus i liked her and thought she was hilarrrrr. -
dont ya feel like sometimes when they show a girl your like, woah who issss she? and then he picks her like 3rd in the rose ceremony and its like what the? (obvi she isnt that interesting or else they would have aired her more- but shes not, so like all the times she talks to brad doesnt even make it onto the show....secretly i feel kinda bad for them)

the topic of all important topics.

2011-01-16T17:23:00.002-07:00

It's been the topic of all important conversations, it's been the controversy of my days, it has even made me settle into a deep pondering. What is it you ask ? What could ever be so important as to throw me off my perfectly spinning axle?

Well when I entered into this world of stars aligned on October 23- the zodiac chart named me Scorpio. As a young one I felt like scorpions were nasty- but learned to love my sign as if it were my own identity. My birthday happens to be on the cusp of Libra and Scorpio and so according to some magazines I was considered a Libra- but I always stayed true to my real colors and read my months future from the Scorpio collum.
You see- until this year I've been a devoted member of the Scorpio sign. And just when I was coming to terms with my inner self and astrology- the world decided to add another sign to the zodiac chart. (something to do with the stars not aligning...) enter Ophichuis. And because of this great deal, I am now considered a Virgo.

Say what!? How does that just happen? How does everyones signs just get to change over night like that? What if my significant other and mines signs don't match up? What if I have a scorpion tattoed all over my back? ( I don't but I'm positive some people do). It's just all very confusing to say the least. Am I just supposed to embrace the Virgo in my life? Or change my birthday to continue my journey in life as a Scorpio? So many desicions I must now make. Not to mentions the worlds greatest pick up line, whats your sign? is now going to bring up contention to those who are not happy with their new sign, or simply just confuse people.. "well i used to be a capricorn..but i dont know what i am now."
"awkward, i cant calculate if we would work well together then..."

I guess I'll just have to see what my fortune reads next month on glamour and decide from there what lies ahead for me. And then I think this will all unfold.

Old: Scorpio

New: Virgo

Yeah I'm a little dramatic. And a little sarcastic. To say the least- it really doesn't make sense as to why they had to change it-but I'm just glad that I don't have to make a laser removal appointment this week. and just between you an me....im secretly crossing my fingers that its all a hoax- cus i really just want to stay my old sign.

did your sign change too? most likely they did. cept a few leo's....lucky people. take a look at the new dates...

Capricorn: Jan. 20-Feb. 16.
Aquarius: Feb. 16-March 11.
Pisces: March 11-April 18.
Aries: April 18-May 13.
Taurus: May 13-June 21.
Gemini: June 21-July 20.
Cancer: July 20-Aug. 10.
Leo: Aug. 10-Sept. 16.
Virgo: Sept. 16-Oct. 30.
Libra: Oct. 30-Nov. 23.
Scorpio: Nov. 23-29.
Ophiuchus: Nov. 29-Dec. 17.
Sagittarius: Dec. 17-Jan. 20.

fail...

dangit.

shoot.

crap.

a day of elevens.

2011-01-11T22:21:00.000-07:00

just for fun.

11 things i love about today- because it IS 1-11-11. what a fun day.

1. first off- i showered which always make me feel nice and happy.

2. i took zachary a jamba at work and got to see him for a little minute before i went to prov.

3. when i opened the fridge there was a nice cold diet coke smiling back at me.

4. my pandora playlist was DEAD ON today. thank you thank you.

5. i went to CPK with some of my pmts posse. they are the cutest and i had missed being with them.

6. i turned in my 6 plastics to get a free lipstick from m.a.c. :)

7. sophie drove with me all the way to prov- it was much better to have someone to talk to rather than be on another pretend talk show....

8. since yesterday i organized my closet- picknig out an outfit this morning was enjoyable and much easier to say the least!

9. teen mom 2 is on tonight? let the games begin!

10. i finished up a couple more things for school- i know im graduated....yet i still have little things - slowly but surely im getting it all finished :)

11. i am happy- and because of that, today is good :)

i decided i want to start another blog challenge...maybe just a 15 day one...? hmmm

breathe

2011-01-07T16:02:00.000-07:00

Hello new year. We've been off to a lazy start. While the rest of the world seems to be making new years resolutions- I've been sleeping in every day, eating nachos for the hundreth time, and watch episodes of ellen and Tyra back to back. Why so slothful? Simply because I'm stresses. And when I get stressed- I go into shut down mode. Its quite backwards really.

The thing is, the last year and half of my life I've been busy. I woke up before 9, was at school all day and was constantly doing something! Even this winter break I was up by 8- and worked all day on the job sites- followed by coming home and playing with all the friends and fam.
Which brings us to now- I am graduated from school and I've hit a wall. My plan was to move back to salt lake and immediately start working. Well sometimes life doesn't go as planned. My contract won't sell and I cant pay for a place for 8 months and not live there. Not in the budget. So I've decided to stay in prov until my contract does sell.

In the meantime I've been looking for something to do- a job that is going to benefit me in Provo and will be okay if I have to all the sudden move back to salt lake- a job that fit in my career field as a cosmetologist. At first I was freaking out. My life wasn't going anywhere and I was supposed to be well on my way right? Well after a few sleepless night (maybe the reasoning for my wake up time of noon) and deep discussions with multiple succesful people I've realized I just need to take a deep breath.

I'm not sure still what is going to happen, who knows where I'll be living 3 weeks from today, and who knows what I'll be doing. BUT as much as it freaks and stresses me out- I realize everything will eventually take it's course and life will go on. That doesn't mean giving up and just letting life go on how it will, I will just simply be intune to every ippurtunity that comes my way! Cus everything does happen for a reason, right?!

....and yeah, i just wrote this eating nachos, in my sweats and topped it off with a lindor chocolate. at least i did make an effort to exercise this morning, good effort indeed.

so today i needed a little positive reinforcement. that i havent failed because i have no idea what im doing with my life, but that i can do whatever i simply want with my life.
for all those who need a little pick me up..

off.

2011-01-06T01:45:00.000-07:00

remember when i said my brain was turned off for a little minute? well it shut off again. not quite sure how it went to the off mode- but im not happy about it.

today i get in my car to head to grand ol provo for a couple days. i start loading my car...
laptop? check. chargers? check. clothes for a few days? check. binder for school? nope...
go back inside and grab it. smile to myself thinking, awesome i got it- lets get the show on the road.

i drive to prov- listening to some tuneskys from my pod. feels like its taking forever to get there but im enjoying my little drive. the minute i pull up to paul mitch i think, mmm lipgloss, i need some lipgloss.
then BAM it hit me like lightening. where the HECK is my purse....i look around my car. no purse. notttt a purse in sight. youre JOKING?! i wish i was. no purse= no wallet, no make up bag, nope-nada. i have zero dollars. doesnt help either than as the minute i got off the freeway in provo my gas light popped up. not a problem right? so annoying.

to say the least- i honestly just have a problem. i do, i cant hid it anymore or deny it. i freaking lose stuff. and its a serious problem of mine that im not sure where i picked it up from or when it started or anything. its by far one of my most annoying weaknesses.
funny thing is, you'd thing i'd learn after a couple times of this same thing happening...but nope. just keeps repeating itself.

new years resolution for lauren numero uno: STOP LOSING THINGS.

thass it. xoxxx.

hello

2011-01-03T23:01:00.000-07:00

so the other day my family went around and told our most embarrassing food we eat. something that we wouldn't normally like to share with the world- coming from my family it could go anywhere because my mom would probably say Wendy's like it was the devil. or anything fast food for that matter. any who i said mine, thinking it wouldn't be a big deal- but nope everyone thought i was insane.
i said...
fire Cheetos.
if you haven't tried them, you should- cus they are delish. i thought it was norm to like such a thing- but my fam thought it was simply the grossest thing they had ever heard.

i don't care. i yell it proudly to the world.

I LOVE FIRE CHEETOS!

that's all :)

whats your embarassing/guilty please snack or meal?

fin.

2011-01-03T00:39:00.000-07:00

its here. its come to an end. my 30 day blog challenge is ALMOST done. right after this post it will be finished! wooooo hoo. it was fun while it lasted- perhaps ill do another one later. i just need to be more consistent about posting.

but here goes...

day 30. 30 facts about you.

1. I must sleep with a pillow in between my legs. or else they hurt like none other.

2. The only toothpaste I will buy is Aquafresh.

3. I do NOT like touching ice. I wrap my otter pop in a towel. it is the worst feeling ever.

4. I have a soft spot in my heart for the homeless. I always give them a buck or two.

5. I hate the way I chew gum- make fun of me I dare you.

6. All The Single Ladies is my least favorite song- in the usa. in the world. in the universe.

7. I don't like tap water. distilled please ?

8. I have the worlds smallest toe nails. they are tiny little rectangles...I've never seen any ones quite like mine...they are wack.

9. I wish for a day I could be famous.

10. I love when people admit to facebook creeping. we all do it...so when someone admits them i give them 10 points.

11. I am so grossed out by uncooked meat...it makes me want to be a vegetarian. but I'm not...

12. I love love loveee drinking water out of a Styrofoam cup. it tastes so much better for some odd reason. like i guzzle cups at cafe rio.

13. One of my fear is that one day ill accidentally hit the cement barriers on the freeway...ya know when all the sudden there is only an inch between you and the barrier? well one false maneuver and that could go bad...i really get nervous being too close to those things. middle lane, thanks.

14. i love getting the hiccups!

15. I can honestly say, I still get confused with my right and left. I have to do the "L" trick with my hands...its so redic, i missed the day in elementary when they learned I guess.

16. Must have paper towels in the kitchen always- i go through those babies like its no ones bidnesss.

17. I think Uggs are the worst shoe ever invented and they should become extinct. Ugg is for Uggly.

18. I always drive on cruise control. even in the 30 mile zones....helps me not speed :)

19. Id rather eat cookie dough or brownie mix than the actual cookie or brownie.

20. I sit Indian style everywhere....church, restaurants, home, school, every chair. Indian style knows whats up.

21. I burp all the time. and its gross. I don't realize it until i hear someone else burp and then I tell myself Ill never do it again...and then I do.

22. I will never call my dad DADDY and my children will never call their father DADDY. cus that is just straight up the most unattractive thing ever.

23. I could eat popcorn for every meal.

24. I gotsta have a straw for my drink. must must.

25. Nail polish? check. I always have at least one in my purse.

26. The older I get, the more nervous I get on planes and flying. but i LOVE the airport.

27. I'm 21 years old and sleep with my blankie. and I will for the rest of my life...if zach doesn't find it and throw it away first.

28. I'm thee WORST at history...learning about people who I feel like I have no connection with is just not my thing. Id much rather learn about personalities and why people do the things they do and all that jazz.

29. Ya know how showers wake people up? not me. they simply PUT ME TO SLEEP. after I get out of the shower I wrap up in my towel and crawl into my bed. night.

30. If it were acceptable, Id still play with my barbies. heck- I'm going to MAKE it acceptable cus i LOVED and still do love barbies.

well there you have it. cheers to a new year and the end to my 30 day blog post :)

1 more to go.

2010-12-25T00:02:00.001-07:00

day 29. who are you?

who am i? well i am lauren.
at school we've done a lot of thinking and understanding about ourselves. how we come off to others, how we communicate, why we are the way we are, etc. i feel like this last year at school ive learned a lot about myself and how i want to come off to others. its frustrating because sometimes i feel like people just know the "highschool" lauren. the lauren that was quiet at times and super insecure. everyone has their fixed interpretation of others right? i always wondered how i came off to people who dont know me very well. well sometimes i wish i could start over with some people- because i truly believe that ive grown up over the past two years. i like who i am, i know what i like, i am so dead set on who i am and what i believe that i actually feel like im comfortable and happy with who i am!

Anywho this is a little bit of what ive learned about myself while discovering and learning about myself.
I am an "expressive" personality. meaning that i am a talker. i can talk for ever and i guess sometimes it scares people...weird. ha i am very into relationships- all different kinds, friends, family, lovers, etc. i am super connected to people on a personal level. i like people in general.
I am also very sensitive. i dont ever want to hurt peoples feelings or make them not like me. yes i do say mean things at times, but i dont like to argue and disagree with people. sometiems ill just agree to avoid conflict. i hate conflicts and contention...
wanna know something funny? my friends the other day were voting like who is the most obsessed with boys, who is the craziest..etc...and guess what i got voted? the most annoying. the most annoying..can you believe it? i could. i wasnt even upset about it...i would much rather be annoying than boring! i think just sometiems at school i drink too many red bulls and i really get so hyper and crazy that i just bug people i suppose. ive really just realized that as long as im happy it doesnt matter if people want me to shut it...cus im just having a grand old time! haha but some of those moments are my favorite of all time :)
the only thing i wish i was better at would be to be more outgoing with people that i feel intimidated by. or people who already know me, but just on a calm level. i wish i could be more loud and the crazy person i really am with just everyone. its really hard for me for some reason to do that around people that i think already think they know what im all about....(if they only really knew). but its something im working on. slowly but surely.

honestly the most important thing ive learned is that i have to love myself before anyone else is going to or even can love me. its the most important thing to believe in yourself and to fall inlove with yourself. its the greatest relationship you can have- might as well make it amazing cus i promise you cant ever escape yourself...might as well make it a love story.

i know that doesnt really tell who i am. i guess you just have to get to know people to really know them right? but if you do never get to know me- i hope that people know that i really am just a nice girl. not out to prove people wrong, but to simply just enjoy life and find people who can make me laugh my head off. i am not one to be depressed about life and i love to find people who are optimistic about life too. i find happiness in the smallest of things and i like anyone who wants to be creative and crazy with me. i love life and im the happiest ive been, and i get even happier every day.

2010-12-24T00:30:00.000-07:00

i cant believe Christmas is just a couple days away! the past few years as some of you may know- i spend my holiday in Mexico doing a service project. it has completely transformed the way i feel and think about my Christmas. it used to be all about the morning of, opening my presents, being so excited to see what i got, all the Xmas craze with shopping and all that. but now days its just a lot more low key- my family doesn't do gifts anymore (with a few exceptions here and there) but nothing like it used to be...and we head on down to Mexico instead of curling up and being lazy inside watching the snow. I'm not gonna lie, at first it was super hard for me to make the change...i wanted the snow and the lights and the magical feeling. but now i realize that there is way more to Christmas than that. i can help a family have a house of their own, a place where their family can live and grow up. its long days and hard work- but its the most rewarding way to spend my Christmas. so yes i am excited for Christmas just a few days away- but not because i get to open presents and all that jazz- but because that means I'm headed down to Mexico, to be with great people, to make a million new little Mexican buddies, for the early mornings and late nights, the amazing food, and to make some family have a very very merry Christmas.

twennieate.

2010-12-22T15:37:00.000-07:00

Day 28. Two confessions.

Okay so i was thinking about what I was going to write about when I was driving back from Provo yesterday and nothing was coming to mind. Of course when Im really trying to pin point something, my mind goes blank. so Im driving along and a T. Swift song comes on and I quickly change it....then it hit me like a ton of bricks...which leads me to my first confession....

confession 1: I am not obsessed/inlove with taylor swift.

i will tell you this- every girl loves taylor swift. she sings about their life and they have her cd in their car for months on repeat. every girls except- me. dont get me wrong, i like her. i think her songs are fun and catchy and i download them and listen to them...but after a while im over it. im done and i dont want to listen to her anymore. id much rather listen to ingrid, or band of horses, or florence +the machine...or anythins else really. unlike most girls , i dont thank her for writing songs that fit my life exactly- cus they dont...and i dont obsess over every thing about her- cus honestly, im just not that obsessed with her. i think im the only girl in the world who isnt- and frankly, about half of the people reading this right now are thinking ew, i dont like lauren anymore. which is fine, but you have to remember that i never said i didnt like her- cus i do, i think she is darling and sweet and innocent...im just not OBSESSED like the rest of the world. so there you have it...i laid it out on the table....now go ahead and judge me for it.

confession 2: i talk to myself. and i dont just talk to myself and have a conversation- i have a full on pretend situation that i act to. so i never really told anyone...until about a week ago- but sometimes when im driving...i pretend that im on a talk show...or that im on a reality show and im a celeb...and i tell ellen allllll about my life and a everything that sounds interesting. and even when im not driving and just walking around my house by myself i pretend like im on laguna beach, or even better- mtv cribs...and i explain the room as i make my way upstairs to get a string cheese. i dont really know why i do this- to be honest its really embarassing...but it makes being alone so much more enjoyable i think! and i didnt feel so dumb when katy told me she does the same thing- but she is usually on political debates and such, instead of ellen. this other confession came to me while driving- when i was pretending that i was some famous singer...on ellen and then i realized how weird i am and confession number 2 was in plain sight for me. so yep- you can judge me again...i still play make believe, but at least i know my imagination still works?

challenge cont.

2010-12-20T19:22:00.001-07:00

day 27. Perfume of choice.

i will list my daily wears...

1. Anna Sui - Flight of Fancy.

my newest one zachary got me for graduation. i spray the heck outt of it at urban every time im there. its delish.

2. Aqua di Gioia.

also very new- got it for my birthday. the mens one is amazing, so i could expect nothing less- i was not disappointed.

3. Ed Hardy Perfume.

believe me- i hate ed hardy too, but it doesnt stop the perfume from smelling amazing.

4. DKNY- be delicious.

one of the more well-known ones. zachs parents got it for me for xmas last year and i used it up already so i had to get a new one :)

( i even got this cute limited edition bottle)

5. MAC- turquatic

not only is it pretty dang cheap but its the perfectly balanced smell. not too fruity, too flowery- just righttttt.

6. Paris Hilton Perfume

just her standard first ever scent. it was my first perfume that was "mine". it was my signature smell and i still like to spray it one every now and again for fun.

7. True Religion Perfume

Im also no T.R. fan- i think its dead and gone, but cant help but love the scent. its a fav.

m.i.a.

2010-12-19T15:46:00.000-07:00

m.i.a.
meaning missing in action.
the best way to put it.
I've had the most INSANE past two weeks.
i haven't had just one moment where i wanted to blog- let alone had time to do so.
however as my life slowly but surely starts to move on back to its normal pace- i shall start blogging again.
but before i move on. here are a few things Ive been up to.

1. graduation from school! can you believe that? I'm done. i never have to go to school ever again if i don't want to! its been the most amazing year and a half and I'm excited to see whats in store up ahead :)

steph was my more than willing model. she was perfect i couldn't have pulled it off without her :)

2. brady came home!

so exciting! he was the first of my good guy friends to come home and it made me so excited to see the rest of them as well. I'm so proud of all of them :)

(he was so nervous even putting his arms around us. it was hilarious)

3. My mentor and example- Winn Claybaugh came to our school again and it was just as wonderful as the first time. i wish i could hang out with him everyday because he is just amazing to be around!

we wore our we love winn shirts again and of course sat front row :)

4. Just yesterday my very best friend came home from his mish! his flight was delayed 2 hours but it was no biggie because his mom and i had already been counting down the weeks so a couple hours wasn't too hard!

welcome home elder cra :)

and lastly i did get bronchitis. i don't have a picture to show for that but you can ask any of my friends and they will tell you that's a great thing- because i wasn't looking so hot.

although being sick is awful- i am so grateful for all the support that was around me. keri took me to the doctor and made me soup, got me sprite, took my temperature- anything i needed. and soph and cate were so sweet to take me to pick up my medication and wait in line for 45 minutes. they checked my room every so hours to make sure i was still breathing and soph made sure i was drinking enough water :)

even joey sent home a little get better baggie full of medicine and a sweet note.

and of course my mom and dad were so kind to drive all the way to provo to pick me up and take me back home and also bring my jeep to salt lake as well. i couldn't thank them enough!

and lastly zachary brought me some delish homemade noodle soup and spent the night with me just watching despicable me while i looked like a hot mess.

i really am so so lucky to have all these friends and family that care about me. i truly am so blessed :

anywho my goal is to finish my 30 day challenge before the end of the year. its not that i dont want to do it- i just take way too much time doing it sometimes that i cant find time in my day to squeeze it in. haha hopefully now that im not as busy i can continue in the blogging world- truth be told i kinda miss it.

so imm back. back for gooood hopefully.

switch

2010-12-03T21:54:00.000-07:00

day 26. turn off and ons in the opposite sex.

offs.

-what are those etnies? skater shoes? woah buddy.

-obsessive tanners. you dont look natural. go scrub off your spray-on.

-over the perfectly sculpted hair. your gelled faux= blehh.

-boys who act like they cant watch girly movies-puhleassse. no one thinks your cool now.

-did you just take your picture in the mirror? shoot me dead.

-bullies, making fun of her/him wont make you look better.

-if you have shopped at buckle within the past year, goodbye.

-crazy partiers. hey will you point me in the direction your going in life? oh you dont know...okay ill ask someone else.

-extremely competitive. to the point where they are MEAN. and ruthless and scary. get a hold of yourself man!

-tools. enough said.

ons.

- basic chivalry. knows how to open the door ya know.

-has a sense of fashion

-likes all types of music

-knows how to hold a conversation with just about anyone.

-has his own likes and dislikes and is passionate about them

-is kind to the waiter. or anyone that is waiting on him in any way shape or form

-comfortable enough to laugh at himself and me

-likes his own family and mine as well. just a family guy indeed

-respectful, knows how girls should be treated

-supports where peoples dreams take them- even if that means dropping out of college and going into hair school.

-just an all-around GOOD boy....i know girls always go for the bad boy, but ill take the good boy and avoid the drama and heartbreak any day.

...just a few i listed. i could always be more picky, knowing me. ha at least i know what i like?

fotos.

2010-11-30T23:41:00.000-07:00

i just feel like posting pretty pictures today is all.

enjoy.

i could look at picys ALL day long.

and then some.

hope some are inspired.

twenti-fiv.

2010-11-29T00:43:00.000-07:00

25. ten movies you love

this is a toughie. its hard to narrow it down because there really are so many movies i enjoy. im not too much of a movie critic- but i usually make sure that i really want to see it before i spend the time and money watching it. so it ends up that i like the movie ya know? and that's how its done.

1. Titanic- i will just never get sick of that one. i do enjoy how much its on TV too. i just dont like when i only catch the last half- so sad. id rather watch the first half any day. however i will never get over how come rose doesn't like let jack come on half the door...or like switch off with him so that he doesn't freeze. i know its a movie- but i feel like they could have prevented his death someway-somehow.

2. Shes The Man- i don't care if its ridic, because its the funniest movie ever. and quoting it makes it much more enjoyable. you actually probably don't want to watch it with me- but that's fine, ill watch it by myself i don't mind :)

3. Just Married- another classic. i could watch it every single day. Ashton is hilarious ps.

4. Clueless- like what a gem of a movie. just an oldie but goodie right? has a dumb plot, but every girl has seen it, and every girl loves it. i am no exception! i wanted to be Cher when i grew up. what a role model :)

5. Bridge to Terabithia- i sobbed. it was the cutest movie. and the little sister in it? ill steal her.

6. 17 Again- judge me. id be fine with it. but zac efron is adorable and i like the simple story line. k its weird that he likes the mom and stuff- but it is her husband, just in zac efron disguise.

7. The Guardian- just a down right good movie. ashton? check. tear jerker? check. i just fell in love right away.

8. Up- it really doesn't get better than Russell. he is hilarious, annoying(in a good way), & cute- which i like. plus anything pixar is fabulous as always.

9. Pearl Harbor- ill admit i must be in the mood to watch the whole 3 hour movie or however long it is. but every time i watch it it does not disappoint. yep i cry my eyes out every time. and i feel like im part of the movie and afterwards I'm stuck in this funk- its weird i know.

10. alright everyone judge me, but i love...the Step Up movies. call me cheesy. i admit, they are super cheesy- ill give you that. but i love them. because i just sit and stare at them dancing wishing i could do that exact same thing. they get away with having dumb plot lines because the dancing is amazing and makes up for it. plus they always have good looking people in the movies anyways so why does it matter?

okay folks now you know how i like the movies. cheesy love stories or sad love stories. its not a big deal really i just wanna laugh or cry i guess...or both.

I'm sure my top ten will change somewhere down the road but for now that will do :)

thanks have a nice day xoxox

ps. i am also aware that the same actors and actresses are repeated in my favorite movies.

ashton is in both just married and the guardian

brittany murphy is in just married and clueless

channing tatum is in the step up movies and in shes the man.

yep thats about it.

k bye :)

twentyfour

2010-11-26T23:46:00.000-07:00

Day 24: Someone you would switch lives with for a day and why

So...Im not going to make this very well thought out- cus im just not in that mood.. im more in the mood for something just off the top of my head.

okay maybe ive thought about it once or twice..

haha.

i guess one of my little secrets is that i always wanted to see what it would be like to be a celebrity. most people think that it would be awful to be followed by paparazzi and have everyone know your life...but for some reason it kind of intrigues me. i just wanna know- im just curious to see what i would feel like. not to the point where im going to somehow try to be famous- becuase its not a life goal...but i really think its something undesrcibable...its something that only you know what it feels like if you experience it. to be invited to every important social event, and to get free clothes in the mail just because some designer wants you to wear it? like what kind of life is that? geezeee. plus i wouldnt mind the good-looking men. im not sure what celeb i would choose to be- i havent thought about it that far yet...but i do know that i would go on a shopping spree for myself and get myself a bunch of stuff so that when i woke up in my regular life id have a fab new wardrobe. plus id withdraw a couple million to help out those in need. it will never happen- but a girl can dream right? i just think it would be interesting to know.

hmmm....

i guess ill never know!

givethanks.

2010-11-25T13:33:00.000-07:00

i am more than blessed. im so grateful for a holiday that encourages everyone to find gratitude in their lives.

most people forget to be thankful because it is easier to focus on ones wants- then blessings. however- i am overwhelmed with the amount i have been blessed with in my life.

i had the opportunity to go to the Greek Orthodox church to help serve thanksgiving meals this morning. i was surprised by the amount of helpers and volunteers that showed up. i went last year as well, but i felt like there were double the amount of help this year. it is such a cool experience to help out our less fortunate friends and it doesn't cost a thing to help! service truly does humble me and i am grateful to know that i have the ability to help others.

just a few things im grateful for:

. a warm house with plenty of food inside.

.a family that loves me unconditionally.

.clothes to wear- and not just one outfit...multiple options and warm shoes.

.friends that love me and make my life the most enjoyable adventure.

.zachary ray- for being my best friend day in and day out.

.eyes to see, limbs to walk, an a healthy body.

.knowledge and the opportunity to gain an education.

.paul mitchell fam- they really are my family: the students, leaders, everyone- ive learned so much from them.

.blankie- because i realized today that a simple blanket can go a long way.

.mexico- i love going down there to enjoy the beauty of it and also help some of my very best friends.

.the sunshine- that gives me hope on a snowy winter day.

.music to fit my every emotion.

. service- knowing that someone as small as me can help is enough satisfaction to make me one happy, grateful girl.

happy thanksgiving.

2010-11-23T22:28:00.000-07:00

23. 5 things that gross you out.

There are of course the basics when it comes to gross things- but i tried to make mine as particular to me as possible. bear with me now.

1. blood & guts. that sorta thing. it know its typical, but it really does make me queezy. csi, war scenes...i have to shut my eyes. and anything like a broken arm with the bone sticking out- ill faint. hasnt happened yet, but im bracing myself for the day i see it in real life in front of my own eyes...nasty.

2. Raw meat. im going to be a terrible mother- because my children wont have meat in their home made spaghetti sauce. the other day when i watched my mom squeeze some sausage into the pan on the stove i about went vegatarian right there on the spot. i cant make up my mind- when i see animals or raw meat- im a vegatarian (or so i tell myself i wanna be) and then cooked meat is placed in front of me and i scarf it down. its so twisted i know, i cant figure it out either. just the raw stuff makes my tounge swell...like right now.

3. Old food in the sink. im aware its just food- but for some reason when its been sitting there with a little water on it, i cant help but wanna shower after touching it. i avoid it at all costs. why wouldnt we all just wash off the plate and then place it in the sink...why leave it in there with food and have it get all soggy? okay okay, ive done it before too...but really like its so gross huh?

4. Smoking. maybe its the smell...but i just think its gross. whoever thinks smoking is "cool" has obviously taken one too many puffs to the brain. its unattractive and it REEKS. really...like does it HAVE to smell that nast?

5. Creepy crawlers. whenever you go to the zoo (the salt lake one) and you go inside that building with all the cute little monkeys and stuff...to the other side of you is scarrrrry creepy crawlers. theres in tiiiiiiny little boxes like a window and if your brave enough you can press your face to the glass and look around the tiny cage until you see the grossiest spider in the world. or a big cockroach...or whatever else they think to put in the cages. ill tell you this- i dont even glance that directions. nope. i dont eeeeven go there. i cant handle a spider in my own room without thinking they are crawling all over me. i will never ever appreciated the need for spiders in the world. sorry- just not happening.

on a more positive note- i passed my state boards today :)
yaay to me :) i bought myself the dodo to celebrate. and took a little nap.
so glad i never gotta do it again!

yay to passing :)