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day 29. who are you?




who am i? well i am lauren.
at school we've done a lot of thinking and understanding about ourselves.  how we come off to others, how we communicate, why we are the way we are, etc.  i feel like this last year at school ive learned a lot about myself and how i want to come off to others.  its frustrating because sometimes i feel like people just know the "highschool" lauren. the lauren that was quiet at times and super insecure.  everyone has their fixed interpretation of others right? i always wondered how i came off to people who dont know me very well. well sometimes i wish i could start over with some people- because i truly believe that ive grown up over the past two years.  i like who i am, i know what i like, i am so dead set on who i am and what i believe that i actually feel like im comfortable and happy with who i am! 


Anywho this is a little bit of what ive learned about myself while discovering and learning about myself.
I am an "expressive" personality. meaning that i am a talker. i can talk for ever and i guess sometimes it scares people...weird. ha i am very into relationships- all different kinds, friends, family, lovers, etc. i am super connected to people on a personal level. i like people in general.
I am also very sensitive.  i dont ever want to hurt peoples feelings or make them not like me.  yes i do say mean things at times, but i dont like to argue and disagree with people.  sometiems ill just agree to avoid conflict. i hate conflicts and contention...
wanna know something funny? my friends the other day were voting like who is the most obsessed with boys, who is the craziest..etc...and guess what i got voted? the most annoying. the most annoying..can you believe it? i could. i wasnt even upset about it...i would much rather be annoying than boring! i think just sometiems at school i drink too many red bulls and i really get so hyper and crazy that i just bug people i suppose. ive really just realized that as long as im happy it doesnt matter if people want me to shut it...cus im just having a grand old time! haha but some of those moments are my favorite of all time :)
the only thing i wish i was better at would be to be more outgoing with people that i feel intimidated by. or people who already know me, but just on a calm level.   i wish i could be more loud and the crazy person i really am with just everyone.  its really hard for me for some reason to do that around people that i think already think they know what im all about....(if they only really knew). but its something im working on. slowly but surely.



honestly the most important thing ive learned is that i have to love myself before anyone else is going to or even can love me.  its the most important thing to believe in yourself and to fall inlove with yourself.  its the greatest relationship you can have- might as well make it amazing cus i promise you cant ever escape yourself...might as well make it a love story.


i know that doesnt really tell who i am. i guess you just have to get to know people to really know them right? but if you do never get to know me- i hope that people know that i really am just a nice girl. not out to prove people wrong, but to simply just enjoy life and find people who can make me laugh my head off.  i am not one to be depressed about life and i love to find people who are optimistic about life too.  i find happiness in the smallest of things and i like anyone who wants to be creative and crazy with me.  i love life and im the happiest ive been, and i get even happier every day.